Thinking about another...but how could (s)he ever compare!

[scomona]

Sometimes I think about getting a friend for Shiloh. He is only 8 months so it would be at least 6 months or more away..... but I cant help to think "how could another dog compare to this perfect loving little guy?"

 

Shiloh is my first dog-ever! My husband had dogs growing up and was looking for someone to keep up with his trail running and who could come to work with him (he works to reduce golf course pesticides and plants natural buffer zones etc). I really never knew that I could feel this way about a human or animal... it still blows me away.

 

Anyways- did anyone else feel that way? Shiloh is a little angel.... he listens, always does what we ask (ok, maybe we have to ask more than once occasionally ), is so polite when we are sleeping (wouldn't dare to wake us), house trained in a few days, stays off the couch, off the bed, cuddles me when Im sad, tries to howl to sing with me and dance..... and wont even eat until we say ok! Of course he has his quirks... but he is just so much fun!

 

Right now he is making his sleeping rounds (kitchen to bathroom to window and then crate)....and I just adore him...

 

Ok- that's it!

[luv2napp]

I think about it alot! Lacee, who is 10, lost her sister 3 years ago. I've been saying I should get another older BC to keep her company. But she's perfect! I can sleep 12 hours without worrying about her needing to go out. She's so well behaved, smart, loving, funny. I'm afraid to bring another into the mix. What if she doesn't like him/her. On the other hand, would she be happier. It's a tough decision.

[sixx]

I am in the same boat.

 

When I was at a fun run recently, this lady who had a bc who was maybe 3 or 4, had just got a puppy (5 months old). She had told me that she had got the puppy because she was so in love with her older bc, that if anything had ever happened to him she wouldn't be able to live.

 

When the time is right you will know. Plus, they can help keep each other company. When I take my pup to the trails, she has way more fun exploring when I bring along my mom's dog. Like they amp each other up over how fun the trail is.

 

Good Luck!

[Shetlander]

It could be Shiloh is your lifetime dog, or it could be that you will love your next dog just as much or even more. I lost my favorite dog ever 5 years ago and still miss him. But that doesn't keep from being a total loon for the dogs I have now.

 

At any rate, if you decide to get another dog, get one for yourself, rather than thinking your dog needs a companion. It sometimes works out that the second dog is a wonderful addition for the first. Or it may be the start of a lifetime of rivalry, stress and hostilities. I've had it work both ways. Getting the second Sheltie was one of the best things I did for my first Sheltie. The two were devoted to each other and when the first Sheltie died, the second plunged into a depression for a few months. Getting Quinn was the worst thing I've done for the Lhasa. I put a lot of thought and energy into keeping peaceful co-existence between them. Every once in a while they play with each other, under my watchful eye and it doesn't end in one of them getting ticked off. But they don't keep each other company and in fact, I can't leave them loose together when I leave the house. If one of them suddenly died or disappeared, the other would be thrilled to never to see him again. Both would be happy to be the only dog, though they both like the universally popular Sheltie well enough.

 

I think you'll find that as Shiloh matures, other dogs are much less important to him. Quinn used to romp and play with dogs when we got together with our "playgroup." Now after excited greetings, he looks to the humans for his fun. He likes other dogs but not like he did at Shiloh's age.

[mbc1963]

FWIW, I think a lot of people feel that way about their first children! They can never imagine loving another one as much - but voila! They do!

 

I remember feeling bad for my first niece when a second child was about to come along and "replace" her - but as soon as the baby was born, he fit in and everything settled in as it should. It's a silly, cutesie cliche', but... love doesn't divide; it multiplies.

 

Mary

[juliepoudrier]

I love all of mine a great deal. They are all such individuals that there really is no comparing them (though sometimes I do). Mary's right that additional dogs make their own spaces in your heart.

 

J.

[PSmitty]

I love all of mine a great deal. They are all such individuals that there really is no comparing them (though sometimes I do). Mary's right that additional dogs make their own spaces in your heart.

 

J.

 

This is so true. We had Lilly for several years before we planned to get another dog. I struggled (oh, did I struggle!) with the decision. Same as the OP, I thought how can another dog compare? Will I have enough love and attention to go around? (this sounds so dumb to me now, but I thought that way back then) It actually took me a few weeks after getting Jack to let go of that, and in short time, it was apparent that it was one of the best decisions we ever made, and I loved him with all my heart. The next dog, there were none of the doubts, because I understood the capacity my heart now had, and to be honest, the third dog has become the canine love of my life, but I don't love the others any less. And even though I had doubts about the fourth dog we just adopted, he has quickly wormed his way in, too.

 

You'll know when the time is right, if you want to add another dog. And you'll probably be surprised at how easily you find room in your heart.

[desertranger]

This is a cause for a lot of argument here. I am told flat out I cannot have another dog under any circumstances and that 2 is enough.

 

Not true, two aren't enoiugh.

[alligande]

The most important thing I learned when I got my first dog as an adult was how much they are all individuals. She passed away a couple of months ago, she was a GSDx and will always be a my special dog we learned together what owning a dog was all about. She thrived and still loved me despite all the terrible mistakes we made in the early years. Bringing Bandit my first BC into the mix did not change our special relationship, they became thick as thieves.

Now we have our 2nd generation of dogs who I love, they will never be Jester, but they are special. Brody is the dog who has me hooked on agility and he and I will always have that experience of two novices at our first trial, nervous and clueless. Rievaulx will be the first dog I raise from a puppy.

[urge to herd]

We've got 2 seniors here. We love them both, they have very different personalities, and there will be no replacing either one of them. Buzz, whom we lost in October 2008, is still loved and missed very much. I still think I see him or hear him fairly often.

 

But, when Sam and Shonie are gone, we'll be getting another dog or two pretty darn quick. Like Mary says, love expands your life. There's more room than you think.

 

Ruth

[Laurae]

I felt that way with Sophie, who was my first dog. But I was interested in stockwork and she was, um, not a good candidate. I wanted to get a border collie to learn with, but I didn't see how I could love another dog as much as Sophie (who is not like all you guys' dogs--she's most definitely not a perfect angel ). Well, enter Taz into my life. The. Best. Dog. Ever.

Um, yeah, loving another dog--not really a problem!

[Anda]

I really cannot imagine having another dog along Ouzo. He's all I need, all I want. He would probably suffer a lot having to share our attention with someone else. I would feel guilty having another dog. Honestly.

[eclare]

I really cannot imagine having another dog along Ouzo. He's all I need, all I want. He would probably suffer a lot having to share our attention with someone else. I would feel guilty having another dog. Honestly.

 

 

I'm getting a new puppy this weekend, and I worry a little about the same thing. But then, when it's just me and Daisy (and no fosters) she looks so forlorn just wandering around the yard by herself. It's a mixed bag, but I feel ready now.

 

And as much as I love Daisy and she is absolutely my heart dog, I seriously cannot have another one like her in my house. She and my last foster had a lot in common - both strong minded bitches. For the first couple weeks I was sure that I was doomed to be a foster failure because they seemed to fit so well. But then the poo hit the fan and they declared all out WAR on each other. Neither is the type to let an argument go, so after a middle of the night trip to the emergency clinic I had to find a new foster home for Scout. It was devestating, but I've learned my lesson. One Daisy is plenty to go around! Fortunately she gets along very very well with young males, so I think the new pup will be a welcome addition.

[shanty]

I've felt the same way, but also know we do NOT have room for another dog! Fortunately we have a neighbour with a Jack Russel pup that Truman loves to death! We just came from a romp on the dykes in the pouring rain and they loved it. Now Truman has a quiet house and can just cuddle with me now that she's gone home. Best of both worlds!

[scomona]

Thanks for all of the responses! I thought I was blabbering a bit.... just feeling lovey dovey for Shi

 

I have thought about our options and I think I have decided that once we move (in the next 4 months) I will offer to foster for BC or Aussie rescues. That way we can help out- and if we happen to find a special friend for us and Shiloh that fits in with the family- they will stay. If we cant foster (for some reason?) then at least we could adopt from a rescue in order to have a trail and find the right fit for the family.

[PSmitty]

I really cannot imagine having another dog along Ouzo. He's all I need, all I want. He would probably suffer a lot having to share our attention with someone else. I would feel guilty having another dog. Honestly.

 

That is EXACTLY how I felt. Oh, how things change!

 

But, hey, I'm all for knowing one's limitations. There is nothing wrong with having just one dog.

[SoloRiver]

I constantly claim that I love Solo more than pretty much everyone else here loves their own dogs, and that's a totally obnoxious claim to make, and I am 99.99999% certain that it is absolutely true. Since adopting Solo I added two more dogs (well, three actually but one no longer lives with me) and I can say with certainty that none of them have budged Solo one iota from his special place in my heart. He is my once in a lifetime dog and when he is gone I will be looking for another Solo for the rest of my life. I doubt I will be lucky enough to find him.

 

That said, I love Fly and I love Jett, and I am so very happy that I have both of them, and they both have their own special roles in my life. Fly is the good girl who I can take absolutely anywhere and my first sheepdog, Jett is my current sheepdog and the only one of the three who will deign to sleep on the bed, and so on. They are all special, and although I have my favorite I love the other two deeply and know that they have excellent lives with me. If they were children they might resent the love imbalance, but they aren't children. I doubt I could spread the affection out much farther, especially considering that Solo gets the vast majority of it, but I really like having three dogs. Even if you have one that you love more than life itself, if your heart is full you will have plenty of affection for another.

[PSmitty]

^^Great way of explaining it, Melanie!

[Kyna]

I think the capacity to love is unlimited. I think each dog is an individual - and it is partially about expectations. When I was a child I couldn't imagine loving dogs more than the dogs we had. Then I got my first dog and I couldn't imagine loving a dog more, he died and I got the older dog we have now and again, I couldn't imagine loving a dog more than her, now we have our younger dog and I love him heaps - I know I'll feel the same way about him one-day. So now I try not to judge and compare - I try to just accept each dog for what they bring to my life. I have been pretty lucky though - although they all have had their idiosychracies I haven't had to deal with major issues.

 

There are no gaurantees though - I have seen people who don't like their dog due to some sort of personality trait or medical problem.

 

My 2 cents though is to allow a single dog to mature into him/herself before getting another dog which, in my world, takes about 3 years.

[juliepoudrier]

There are no gaurantees though - I have seen people who don't like their dog due to some sort of personality trait or medical problem.

Guilty! My friends know that Farleigh is not my favorite dog, but despite his issues, I still try to love him and show him love. I just have to be very careful that he doesn't interpret my attempts at affection for him with something he needs to protect himself from..... He's a very hard dog to love, thanks to his issues, but I try.

 

J.

[Laura L]

There are no guarantees though - I have seen people who don't like their dog due to some sort of personality trait or medical problem.

 

I like Stella just fine, she's a good worker, but I don't love her like I love the others. She drives me nuts with her need to eat inedible objects-corn cobs, silicone inflations, socks, gloves, sticks, clumps of wool...I feel sometimes like I need to put a muzzle on her because if I try to get her to spit whatever it is out she just scarfs it down faster. I feel bad about it sometimes, but she's fine when we're working, she gets along with the other dogs and is pretty happy in general. I'm sure that some of it was how she was raised, I didn't get her until she was 5.

 

Laura

[Root Beer]

I will admit to having favorites among my dogs. They aren't children. I treat all of them very well. They all have more than adequate food, shelter, interaction, training, and affection. But I have favorites.

 

Among them, Speedy is the most special. He's the only one that I raised from puppyhood and he is my "heart dog".

 

For a long time, I really didn't like Maddie all that much. She fit well into our group, but for the first couple of years that we had her, she was more my husband's dog. That changed when I started training her. We did bond after training together for a while. I still wouldn't say she is my "favorite", but I love her very, very much. She has her own place in my heart and it's an important one.

 

Although he was our first, Sammie is a different kind of dog. He's very independent. He really wants to do more of his own thing. I'd say of all of mine, he and I are least close. I love him, of course, but he really doesn't need to be anyone's favorite.

 

So, Dean came into this mix three years ago. I did wonder how he would fit. I knew I would compare him to Speedy and I thought he could never live up to that comparison. I will say, though, that Dean shot right up into "equal favorite" status pretty quickly. You can't not love Dean with all your heart. Total strangers have fallen for him in an instant! He really has a gift when it comes to love and affection!

 

Dean isn't my "heart dog", but I don't love him any less than Speedy, who is. It's odd, but that's how it is. And, I found that the whole "favorite" thing kind of evened out after Dean came along.

 

As others have said, there is room in my heart for all of them. I don't think of them all the same way, but they all have their own place. And I've found that just as relationships with people are fluid and changing, so it is with my dogs.

[Cody & Duchess]

I know that there is a saying that you should love all your children the same. But in reality is that true? You love them all, but you can love them different. I think the same is for your dogs. (I know dogs are not kids- but....) I still terribly miss my Sheltie Jake, but Duchess and then Cody both are special to me. I find they add to your life in a manner that I never anticipated. I am not saying that every dog can fit into every pack, just saying that if the dog fits - you probably will bond to that dog in a manner that surprises you.

[Jacks_Mom]

I have been trying to talk my siginificant other to get a playmate for jack because he needs someone to play with, his cats do not play like he would like them to. The "big man" (is what we call the significant other cause he is 6'2' and jack and myself are a little on the short side) says that we do not need another one right now and jack would jealous because gets jealous when I pet his cats or other family memebers animals (not just jealous he blocks them and wont let them in my reach). I see his point of view but this time I want to get a dog from rescue (there is one I want sooooo bad at a rescue now she is so cute http://www.petfinder.com/petnote/displaype...petid=15498716). Other than just going to get her with out his knowledge, that would not be good its not nice to make the big man mad..lol anyway... I think a playmate would be good for him, maybe get him out of this jealous thing. But on the other hand it might not work out like I want it to, and I don't want to get her and they not get along..... Has any one on here ever fostered any dogs, was thinking about that to see how they get along but it is already love at first sight with just the pictures don't think when the time came I could let her go.

[geonni banner]

Sometimes I think about getting a friend for Shiloh. He is only 8 months so it would be at least 6 months or more away..... but I cant help to think "how could another dog compare to this perfect loving little guy?"

 

Shiloh is my first dog-ever! My husband had dogs growing up and was looking for someone to keep up with his trail running and who could come to work with him (he works to reduce golf course pesticides and plants natural buffer zones etc). I really never knew that I could feel this way about a human or animal... it still blows me away.

 

Anyways- did anyone else feel that way? Shiloh is a little angel.... he listens, always does what we ask (ok, maybe we have to ask more than once occasionally ), is so polite when we are sleeping (wouldn't dare to wake us), house trained in a few days, stays off the couch, off the bed, cuddles me when Im sad, tries to howl to sing with me and dance..... and wont even eat until we say ok! Of course he has his quirks... but he is just so much fun!

 

Right now he is making his sleeping rounds (kitchen to bathroom to window and then crate)....and I just adore him...

 

Ok- that's it!

 

Weeeeellll. Chocolate and raspberry are two flavors that couldn't be much more different. It's hard to say which I like better - but they are oh, so GREAT together!