Ghost bit me.

[herdcentral]

I was just basically told by someone that I thought was a good friend that this most recent choice was a horrible one. They were completely for me rehoming him, so keeping him is wrong.

 

So basically, I can put him down, otherwise known as A Monster.

I can rehome him, otherwise known as Irresponsible and Cowardly.

Or I can keep him, otherwise known as Stupid and Uneducated.

 

How am I supposed to know??

 

 

Autumn, to help you make a choice is what a trained professional will help you do.

 

Someone who is not emotionally involved with you or the dog. Someone who can see what is really happening, look at the relationship you have with your dog and also assess perhaps the person who is interested in taking Ghost on. The above choices are all valid and with the right professional help you can make the one that is in the best interest of you and your dog.

[bcnewe2]

Ok Autumn

If I was there I'd give you a great big hug and tell you to chill. Don't know if you're old enough but if you are, have a drink or maybe even 2! Now that we got that out of the way....

You are not in a frame of mind to DO anything but take a break from all of this.

Can't you leave Ghost where he's at for now? Maybe 2 weeks or so? Just some time to wrap your mind around all this and let your wrist heal a bit? Hard to feel or think the right way when your wrist is hurting...the drinks will help that a bit

Now....get some paper, write down your real options, not the internet ones but what's truely available to you. Sit back again and think about things, Get your head on straight and be calm, read read read and make some calls, educate youself for what's up ahead. Then....go get Ghost. You can't have any baggage in your head when you get him back so I think he's got to be gone long enough for your wrist to not hurt. You got to have a plan not fear or guilt.

 

Start all over again with him, like he's a new dog. Use some of the techniques you've been reading about. if you can afford it, get the behaviorist there with you for guidence and confidence. IF not get someone, maybe the guy that's been keeping him to work with both of you or to watch both of you and how you interact with him. This is not going to be easy, you're gonna be scared, rightfully so. but you can't have him with you if you're scard. He'll know in a heartbeat. I do think a trip to the vets in order, you might just find it's medical and can be worked out with meds. Maybe after you have him home a day or 2 you can take him to the vet. I wouldn't do it the same day you get him back. You both need some time together without the added stress of a trip to the vet. Maybe the guy that's keeping him can take him before you come get him. That way you'd be ahead of the game.

 

Take it one day at a time. little baby steps. You've done ok so far till this incident. Simple mistakes that you're making and didn't know you were making have to be corrected. Reading and educating yourself will give you new tools. It would be so much easier if you can have professional help but you have to work with what you can afford. In the past if I had expenses that I coudn't afford I'd get a chage card out and then pay it off as quickly as I could but this deserves all you got. Do what you can for expenses. Sell something, have a garage sale, bake sale, what ever it takes.

 

If you feel you aren't making progess go back to your list and try the next step. If that's rehoming him, you'll have to be determined to find the perfect home. I personally don't think it's impossible. Heck, i've taken on 3 dogs in the past with way worse issues and been able to retrain/rehibilitate the dogs and place them in perfect homes. I've kept some, got some now. Some took over a year to find the right home for and work out their/our issues. Some will always be a work in progress but we learn together.

I didn't ever stop looking. Had no choice. Or didn't like the other choice. They are all successful placements. If I'm not the perfect home then by doG I'm going to find the perfect home.

 

Your good friend is worried about you. She/he sees what you've been though and is only trying to protect you. But you love Ghost. They don't. They love you and want what's best for you. I hope you want what's best for Ghost. That may take a while to get the 2 to gel but I have confidence that you can.

 

Keep writing here and we'll keep spitting out advise, weather you like it or not, you'll read it and take what works for you and let the rest fall around you. You are right, we don't know you and we don't know what you've been though but I do know, he's your dog, you love him and want what's best for him. YOU CAN DO THIS!

 

take care and relax for a while. You've earned it. I'm sure Ghost is.

 

Kristen

[urge to herd]

I feel for you, Autumn, you and Ghost both. If it's any comfort, this is one of the hardest decisions you'll ever have to make. Whatever decision you make you will learn from if you're willing, that's one of the few guarantees in life.

 

No one else CAN make this decision but you. The other guarantee I can give you is that whatever you decide, you'll have some tough times ahead. Keep him and try to work through it, rehome him, or euthanize him - there are really no easy, pain free, no regrets roads here for you and Ghost.

 

Whatever you decide, you'll need to toughen up a bit. You'll need to be able to clearly and honestly say to your critics, and they will come out of the woodwork, "I did what I felt was best for Ghost." and then stick to your statement.

 

I have to say, I admire your courage for coming here with this issue and sticking with the discussion. I know your heart is absolutely breaking at this moment. Already, you've gained valuable resources and hopefully, some clarity as to what might be coming your way with each option.

 

Doing this kind of gut wrenching, soul disturbing self examination is what makes real adults out of people. It ain't fun, but it makes for strong, compassionate, and resilient grown ups.

 

I wish the best for Ghost and you. I wish that soon you will find some clarity and know what you need to do. I hope that you find as much support and empathy as I've found during the most difficult times of my life.

 

Ruth

[Alaska]

Autumn,

 

You made a decision. You put Ghost in a kennel. He is safe. You are safe. It sounds to me like you made a good decision. Relax, and take a break before trying to make any more.

 

I just reviewed this website: k9agression.com and I think you might find it useful. But first, take a break.

[Sue R]

I don't know what is right. I don't KNOW what to do, how am I supposed to know that?? I make a decision and think I know it's the "right" one and I always end up doubting myself.

 

How am I supposed to know??

 

I am so sorry that you and Ghost are having to go through all this. I apologize for making a post concerning the breeder. That was not relevent.

 

I know just what you are saying here as I am a world-class self-doubter, as well. Only it's one thing to try and make a decision about something less important, like boots or what's for dinner, and an issue that has serious, long-term consequences for you, Ghost, and anyone else involved in a potential rehoming.

 

You've gotten some terrific advice, some comments that you didn't want to hear, and a lot of support. If you can at all do so, go with those that advise qualified professional help as a first choice. As pointed out, he is safe and so are you right now, take a breather, seek out help, and go with the option that gives you the opportunity to go with option #2 if that doesn't work out in a reasonable amount of time. Save option #3 for last, as it's irreversible.

 

You may have done virtually everything right with Ghost. You certainly seem to have tried. As pointed out, no matter what the breeding, some dogs are just not "wired" right, and whether or not someone can cope with that and manage it safely is a personal decision. In addition, not everyone's personality will work with every dog's personality. You have seen several examples in posts where a particular pairing of dog and handler was great, but a pairing of one or the other with a different "partner" was a disaster.

 

No matter what the outcome, you will wonder, "Could I have done more" or "Should I have done this instead". As Eileen said, we can't see the future and can only make decisions based on the past and present, and I hope that, whatever your decision, you can realize you made the best choice you felt you could under the circumstances, and be comforted by that realization.

 

Very best wishes to you both.

[painted_ponies]

I think re-homing Ghost, with someone who is fully aware of his issues and whom you trust to deal with those issues, is the best idea.

 

My favorite dog I ever had was given to me after he nearly killed an Irish Wolfhound and would've punctured his owner (a bunch of times) had her reflexes been a little slower. I had him thirteen years and would have him for another thirteen tomorrow given the chance. He had a great life with me and went everywhere I went.

 

Actually, that dog's owner was far more experienced in dogs than I was - I was just a nineteen year old kid with quick reflexes who clicked with the dog. I was fully aware of what I was getting into - and the dog's owner was a good friend whom I saw frequently, and I'm sure she'd have stepped in if things went south.

 

So why not give it a try with the folks who are willing to take Ghost, and see how things turn out? I mean, it's a dog after all, not a man-eating tiger.

[bc4ever]

This could be way off base, but after reading all the comments, it occurs to me that some dogs and some people just don't click. Do you like everyone you meet? I know I don't. Does that make you a bad person? No. Does that make the other person a bad person? Probably not. Why do we expect our dogs to behave the same way around everyone they come in contact with? I remember getting Scooter as a pup and thinking, "What if he doesn't like me?" I can tell he reacts differently to different people. Granted, he's never bitten me, but he has nipped my husband a few times, and as several folks have mentioned when they were kids it was "What did you do to make the dog bite you?" and that has always been the case with DH and Scooter. It sounds like you really love this dog, and I agree maybe you just need a "trial separation" to work things out and give you a fresh perspective. And I'm not saying Ghost doesn't "like" you--something snapped--try not to take it personally. You just need to figure out what it was and start over. Getting over your fear of him will probably be the hardest, but I hope you don't give up on him yet. When it comes down to it, you'll make the right decision for him and you, and you'll know in your heart it was right, whatever you decide. Good luck!

[dinah_kay]

However, first he will be neutered, and his thyroid will be screened.

 

I think it is great that you are getting all of this done. Be sure when you get his thyroid tested that you make sure they do a full thyroid panel. Some vets only do a partial panel, and that really won't help give you a full picture. When I had a thyroid done on two of my dogs I had one tested through my vet and then sent the results to Dr. Dodd, and on the other I sent the blood directly to Dr. Dodd for her to test:

 

http://www.itsfortheanimals.com/HEMOPET.HTM

Note, Regarding Thyroid testing:

 

The COMPLETE Thyroid Panel is needed for an ACCURATE diagnosis and assessment of Thyroid Function. Dr. Dodds' Thyroid Panel # D8T provides the values for: T3, T4, free T3, free T4, T3 Autoantibodies and T4 Autoantibodies. The fee for that testing is $65., which includes Dr. Dodds' expert interpretation.

 

If you'd like to have the COMPLETE Thyroid Panel AND the other Blood Chemistry values, the Profile 7200 includes the CBC, Differential, Superchem, AND the Complete Thyroid Panel, D8T as specified above. The fee for this extensive testing which also includes Dr. Dodds' interpretation is $95.

 

A little reminder, Dr. Dodds' testing through her non-profit HEMOPET is less expensive and there will be an additional nominal fee for your local vet to take the blood samples, spin the blood, etc., plus the postage (I send it myself). See additional info below.

 

You can also check out Dr.Dodd's site directly at www.hemopet.org

 

Best of luck!