How to train your friends

[galwaygirl]

Why is it that people are harder to train than dogs? I am a firm believer in consistency consistency consistency when training and I get great results. Unfortunately, not all of my friends adhere to this technique when around myself and my dogs. I have worked endlessly with Harper on things like sitting for attention, waiting for food, waiting to leave her crate, sit/down for treats, and other basic doggy manners. She is really good around people who know to wait for her good behavior but I have several friends who seem to promote her 'bad' manners. It's not that she isn't well behaved, she is just one of those dogs who needs a firm hand or she will exploit your weaknesses. If given the opportunity, Harper will happily jump up on people that she knows will 'reward' her by giving her attention or doting over her general cuteness. She also sometimes does this to new people, maybe because she gets excited or knows they won't reprimand her. Basically she will gladly take advantage of people if they allow it. I'd say her most common 'bad' manner is this type of jumping.

 

So I need a way to get my friends to treat Harper as consistently as I do and a friendly way to correct them when they don't. Most of these people are dog people so my hope is they will understand. I just want to confront them in a way that won't make them feel stupid. They see how I treat my dogs, I can't be the only person who has had this problem, what is the best solution?

[eclare]

Just be straightforward. Tell them that you know they mean well, but what may work for their dogs doesn't work for Harper, and you need to be really strict and consistent about Harper's manners. Don't make a huge deal out of it. Just mention it the next time they do something that's not helpful. If they encourage her to jump up, just say, "Oh, please don't reward her for that. I'm trying really hard to curb that behavior." And if they say "Oh, I don't mind if she jumps up," just say, "I know. It's just that we're really trying to break the habit."

 

People are understanding. There's no reason to make a big deal out of it.

[Izzysdad]

^^^Exactly. Izzy is like this. She LOVES people and will jump on people, we've worked hard on getting her not to jump and she doesn't do it with us anymore, but will with strangers.

 

I've had to be pretty firm with some people who just don't get it, but if they're your friends they should understand, and if they don't, then jump on them as well and see if they like it

 

Tim

[Lewis Moon]

Why is it that people are harder to train than dogs? I am a firm believer in consistency consistency consistency when training and I get great results. Unfortunately, not all of my friends adhere to this technique when around myself and my dogs. I have worked endlessly with Harper on things like sitting for attention, waiting for food, waiting to leave her crate, sit/down for treats, and other basic doggy manners. She is really good around people who know to wait for her good behavior but I have several friends who seem to promote her 'bad' manners. It's not that she isn't well behaved, she is just one of those dogs who needs a firm hand or she will exploit your weaknesses. If given the opportunity, Harper will happily jump up on people that she knows will 'reward' her by giving her attention or doting over her general cuteness. She also sometimes does this to new people, maybe because she gets excited or knows they won't reprimand her. Basically she will gladly take advantage of people if they allow it. I'd say her most common 'bad' manner is this type of jumping.

 

So I need a way to get my friends to treat Harper as consistently as I do and a friendly way to correct them when they don't. Most of these people are dog people so my hope is they will understand. I just want to confront them in a way that won't make them feel stupid. They see how I treat my dogs, I can't be the only person who has had this problem, what is the best solution?

Tell me about it Same here. I think the same feeling that prevents folks from repremanding your kids for bad behavior prevents them from repremanding your pooch. Cerb knows not to jump up on me or my family, but will freely jump up for a face lick on everyone else. We have begged folks to observe the "no petting unless his butt's on the ground" rule and to knee him away (NOT kick, just push) and give a stern NO....but they don't. Not even other dog owners. He never jumps on us so we have to resort to "second person" repremands when our friends can't follow our wishes.

[geonni banner]

Ok, this is long, so skip it if you want. But this has been a hobby-horse of mine for some time. I wrote this about 5 years ago.

 

Why Not Squeaky Voices?

 

Ok, now everyone will know for sure that I am a grade-A, certifiable curmudgeon. But it’s time to take the gloves off. No more Ms. Nice Gal.

It’s a lovely afternoon, and my Lurcher, Grace and I are walking to the local market. Everybody knows Grace. They know me too, but a much larger percentage of them like Grace than me. I have bad knees. My dog knows this. She is very good about keeping a loose lead and not crashing into me. She knows that these things are likely to make me fall down. And, by the way, lots of people know this too.

Everything is going well, until we’re almost at the store. Then one of “The Squealers” comes into view.

The Squealers are a pair of nice people who are very fond of Grace, and tolerate me because they sort of have to if they’re going to get to interact with my dog. They are in Greyhound Rescue and I got her from them. As soon as they catch sight of her they start to squeal. Their normal speaking-voice vanishes, and is replaced by a high-pitched, singsong of obnoxious phrases that would make a spoiled toddler blanch in disgust. To me it’s like fingernails on a chalkboard.

To my dog it’s the signal to act like a complete fool. Bam! She runs out to the end of her lead and gyrates like a go-go dancer on amphetamines. She pulls and scrabbles at the pavement like she’s never heard of leashes. She only stops at the end of the lead because I, having noticed The Squealer before her, have tightened my grip on the leather until my knuckles are turning white. I plant my cane firmly in front of me, establishing a nice firm tripod balance, and try to speak to my dog in a normal tone of voice. But she doesn’t hear me – partly because she’s too distracted, and partly because I’m being drowned out by the squealer.

Sometimes I drop whatever I’m carrying when Grace slams into the end of her lead. Sometimes I come close to losing a finger to a suddenly-tightening leash. This tends to make me cranky. I try to think of it as a training opportunity – the words planned distraction pass through my mind, but here’s the problem. No matter what I do to correct the dog, (and it has to be something fairly dramatic to capture her attention,) it is viewed as either evil or funny to The Squealer.

Now understand, under any other circumstance my dog maintains a belly of slack in her lead. She doesn’t try to go around the other side of a no parking sign or tree when reading her pee-mail. She is a perfect lady.

 

Squealers as a group seem to have the notion that a dog can do nothing wrong. They seem to find delirium in an otherwise sane and well-behaved dog to be the most delightful thing imaginable. If I correct my dog, physically or even verbally, for behaving in such an annoying manner I am seen as some sort of dog-hating Nazi. This leads them to the next phase of their program. The glom onto the dog, petting her, stroking her and continuing to squeal, they say to her, “Ohhhhhhhhhh, it’s not her fawt, she’s dust happy to shee me!”

I’m not making this up. It happens with some regularity.

Now don’t get me wrong. My dog is allowed on the furniture. She gets a massage every day. We play ball. We roughhouse. I love her, and I want her to have fun. But I don’t want to have my personal safety at risk every time I take her for a walk.

 

When The Squealers do manage to speak in a normal tone of voice, they tell me how wonderfully well behaved my dog is. They praise her obedience. She comes when she’s called – every time – right away. This is pretty darn good for a sighthound, well, half sighthound. She sits on command and remains seated until she gets a release command. She leaves the garbage alone. She doesn't jump up on people. She doesn’t beg at the table. I’m always hearing, “Oh, I wish my dog would be so good.”

They tell me that their dog “won’t let them cut her nails.” They have to put their dog in a straitjacket to go to the vet. Their neighbors are complaining about the barking. But I’m the bad guy for correcting my dog for acting a fool and nearly causing me a fall.

Someday I may figure this one out. Maybe I’ll get smart enough to devise a strategy that will extinguish this temporary insanity each time it occurs.

Perhaps I can set up a situation with a non-squealing friend in which we can work on this problem in a more controlled setting. (Except she only does this with The Squealers.) But the thing I keep coming back to is - why do they do it? I’ve told them all how it affects her. They can see it for themselves – but they don’t stop. Go figure. I hate them…

[JohnLloydJones]

As soon as they catch sight of her they start to squeal. Their normal speaking-voice vanishes, and is replaced by a high-pitched, singsong of obnoxious phrases that would make a spoiled toddler blanch in disgust.

Squealers are everywhere, disguised as normal people until they reveal themselves. The most amusing meeting with squealers was at an adoption event some weeks back. We had arrived early and folks were still setting up. I fumbled with the leashes and my newest foster managed to make a break for it. He was headed in the right direction, but as I was attempting to run after him, three women saw what was happening and as a group started to squeal and beckon him towards them. As soon as they started, Bear slowed down, hesitated and then ran straight back towards me. He had decided that, new as I was to him, I was a safer bet than a group of women behaving in such a strange manner.

[scomona]

I decided that I would tell my friends that Shiloh was a working dog (on a golf course) and he needs to have good manners. I took a bit further and said that he is off leash a lot and if their are kids at the course or in the park and you let him jump on you- then he could try the same thing with the kids are seriously injure them but knocking them down or scratching them.

 

So its not us, its not you....its for the safety of the kids.

 

All true...(we don't have kids...and neither does the golf course, really) but, it helped to take anything personal out of it and also let them know how important it was to us and for safety reasons. The better Shiloh is, the more freedom he gets.... so please follow the rules, if you want him to be a happy dog!

[bc4ever]

Next time someone comes through the door, jump on them and knock 'em over. If they're not afraid of your dog, they'll be afraid of you afterward. Ahhhh... if only it were that simple.

 

My adult nephew enjoys getting Scooter riled up and he definitely knows better. I tell people not to throw his ball down the hardwood floor hallway, but they do it anyway and Scooter obligingly goes racing to get the ball, adding more gouges to the floor, slipping and sliding, causing his hip to act up.

 

I've found that the direct approach works best--"Don't do that!" If they don't listen, at least Scooter will respond to the command!

[galwaygirl]

That squealer story is so appropriate it hurts, if there is one thing Harper can't resist is high pitch baby voice. It sends her into this weird full body wag thing that makes her look like she has a spinal disorder. Some people have no shame. Thanks for the advise, maybe I'll just print flyers and hang them around the neighborhood.

 

 

A girl can dream...

[BustopherJones]

Human Training Aid

[Lewis Moon]

 

That ought to work..... Cute pup. My Border/Lab mix has a gigundo "otter tail" so he can actually do serious damage when he gets into the full body wag.

 

PS: Is your moniker a Steve Earle reference? One of my favorite songs of his.

[geonni banner]

That squealer story is so appropriate it hurts, if there is one thing Harper can't resist is high pitch baby voice. It sends her into this weird full body wag thing that makes her look like she has a spinal disorder. Some people have no shame. Thanks for the advise, maybe I'll just print flyers and hang them around the neighborhood.

 

 

A girl can dream...

 

I just want to tell people sometimes, "If you are within twenty feet of my dog, keep your mouth shut and your hands in your pockets." That's not asking too much, is it?

[galwaygirl]

Yes it is, one of my favorites too!

[eclare]

That picture is adorable. I'd probably squeal, too. (Just kidding - mostly)

[border_collie_crazy]

how to train people..that is the question! people are forever getting mad at me about Misty jumping, but its REALLY hard to fix when I firmly tell EVERYONE we meet that she is not to be touched unless she is sitting..I didnt think it was that hard of a concept, and yet...I can name only 3 people aside from myself in Mistys 7 years that have actually followed the rule..and guess what? she doesnt jump on any of us! this is how everyone else interpretes this:

 

*misty tackles person and flips so her back is flush with their body*

*person starts petting and cooing her*

*I correct Misty and puts her in a sit*

me: "please dont give her any attention unless she is sitting"

them:"oh I dont mind!"

me:"I do. she is not allowed to jump, you can give her all the attention you want as long as her feet are on the floor"

*Misty jumps up again*

them: "Misty, no, sit"

*Misty sits*

*person then completly ignores her while she is sitting, doesnt so much as glance her way*

*Misty jumps up again, they pet her then ask her to sit..she sits...they procede to ignore her*

 

[mbc1963]

Dang. Tasers are illegal in Massachusetts. ::Sigh::

 

Mary

[2 Devils]

Teaching the friends and family can be harder than the dogs.

 

I am still workign on training my husband that you do not pet the dogs if they are being bouncy instead of sitting. You cannot pet them the are jumping on you. Please walk away from the dogs until you can follow directions set forth. My dogs normally do not jump on me because they don't get petted or attention if they do. They don't get all squirmy, wiggle butt for more than a couple seconds becasue they know they won't get attention from me. The new dog in the house is a work in progress though so all bets are off there. The new dog, Nali, is a launcher not just a jumper and she mouths horribly. So my husband does the exact opposite of what I ask and wrestles with her which makes her mouth more. And he wonders why she is getting no better.

 

My dogs also jump on others. Why do you ask? Because everyone is always petting them when they do. I finally yell at the people and put my dogs outside.