Why does he do that?

[dahle50]

Jake is 71/2 month old BC male who is very sweet and has been socialized since getting him at 7 weeks old. He has one quirk so far, he barks at my step daughter who has visited infrequently (she's 22, last year of college). He met her the first month we had him, so its not like he wasn't exposed to her. What happened is that she came to visit last week, and he seemed afraid of her, barking and backing away. I told her to ignore him, and I corrected him-tho he still was unsure, and if she moved to another place in the room, he would begin barking...I did not push him to meet her..tho my DH didn't agree with me..

We needed to take her to a automotive store, so My DH and Catherine (my step) traveled in the front seats, and Jake and I sat in back. We got to the store and stood in line, Jake sitting. Strangers cam up to pet Jake, and he was fine with them..even a small child...Jake waged his tail and was happy to meet them all..I took the opportunity for him to "meet" Catherine again and this time he was more friendly, tho reserved. (I felt rather sorry for my step daughter..as she witnessed Jake meeting strangers with no problem..)

Anyway, today she visited again, and he started barking and acting fearful again. I corrected him, told him it was OK, had him lie down, but he was not convinced..I even gave her one of his balls to play with him, and he would not move (Jake is crazy about playing ball..it is his job..lol).so my question is what is going on here? Jake has never behaved this way ever..(we have a house keeper who comes in 2x a month and Jake has no problems with him)..so I am stumped...any thoughts?

Thank you

Chris

[olivehill]

When he met her as a puppy did anything bad happen? Or has he had a bad experience with someone who looks like her?

 

One of our dogs refused to accept one of my cousins after she had a bad experience with him. He didn't do anything badly, but she's very watchful of her family and during a family get together that we hosted he and all the kids were in one of my daughter's rooms with the door closed. They got to rough housing and he was tickling my daughter who, at that time was 7 or 8, she was giggling, but also screaming/yelling. The dog couldn't see them to see it was play and freaked out trying to get through the bedroom door. They stopped and came out and he tried everything to "apologize" to her. Every time he came over after that he'd greet her, hold his hand out for her to sniff, but she never trusted him again. She was never aggressive but she would give a throaty growl when he first came in and watch him like a hawk the entire time he was here. She never forgot that he may have hurt her people that one time. There was just no way to help her understand what had happened.

[beachdogz]

Responding to Olivehill's story...I had a similar incident. Years ago, when I still lived at home, I got my first German Shepherd puppy. My brother was married and did not live with us. Once, when he came to visit, I told him to go upstairs to my room and peek in at my new puppy. He went upstairs, got down on his hands and knees, and opened the door. When the puppy went to the door, he yelled "Raaahhh" real loud and scared him. My brother thought it was a really funny, big joke.

 

In the following years, when I would return home on holidays and bring my then grown dog, when my brother came in the back door (and we were in the living room), that dog (seriously) could SMELL him, and would got into a crazy barking frenzy. My brother didn't have to say a word...that dog knew it was him coming in the kitchen! He hated my brother...and all from that one single incident when he was a puppy. And that dog had no problem with other people and was my first UD dog. My dog hated my brother till the day he (my dog) died.

[arf2184]

Was she wearing a hat, sunglasses, scarf, big dangly earrings, perfume or anything like that that might have triggered it? Meg used to get nervous about ear muffs and was weary of people who wore them, even after they were removed.

 

Meg takes a long time to trust people who have fallen out of her favor in the past too. She is still weary of our agility trainer whom she started to associate with the evil teeter a year and a half ago. She's long since gotten over her teeter concerns, but she still won't approach the trainer unless she thinks she has a treat for her. Prior to being introduced to the teeter, they had no issues and Meg was happy to see her when we went to class. Now they just keep their distance from each other except when Meg is in a good mood. Then she'll go up to the trainer searching for treats.

 

I would not scold your dog or tell him 'no' or even try to reassure him for this. He's uncomfortable and this is his way of telling you. Instead, just redirect him by having him either lay in a spot away from the person or sit behind you or something along those lines. When he's quiet and doing what you asked, praise him. That way he'll learn there's a better way to say 'hey, I don't know about this person.' (Also, I want my dogs to bark and tell me if a 'strange' person has entered the house. That's part of their job. Its also their job to stop and go lay down or move away when I okay the person though.)

 

I'd encourage you daughter to completely ignore the dog. Don't look at him, talk to him, say his name, or reach for him. Have her carry treats around when she comes and gently toss them in the dogs direction every so often (only when he's quiet and not in panic mode). Once he starts to get more comfortable, then have her offer them in an open palm so he has to come all the way to her. Then when he's ok with that, encourage some ball playing. Don't let her try to pet or reach for him until he's comfortable enough to not shy away. Barring any grudges on his part, I think you'll find he'll come around and she'll become known to him as the treat dispenser...at least for a while.

[mbc1963]

Sounds like your dog is reacting in the house, not elsewhere. My dog is MUCH more fearful and protective inside his own territory than he is out in the world. Strangers can sit calmly, but if they move to a new room or even return to the room after going to the bathroom, it's as if they have never been in the house before.

 

So, it's possible your daughter didn't even do anything scary - just that she's an infrequent visitor to the home turf.

 

For my reactive dog, slow movements, no sudden actions, lots of tiny pieces of chicken... they all seem to help smooth the path for visitors. Once he's familiar, he's fine - but familiarity doesn't happen for him in one or two visits.

 

Mary

[Donald McCaig]

Dear Doggers,

 

I once had a good pet dog trainer explain: "Border Collies are 'incident-critical'. They learn so quick they can repeat a mistake three times - and turn it into a habit - before you can react."

 

Every time I stopped the car at our mailbox, Slick would go nuts, barking and carrying on. I didn't understand why (the mailbox was inert and hadn't insulted him) until last week when Fly went nuts at the order box of the drivethru. She thought I was having a conversation with a plastic box. Now, for Fly, that was very strange and perhaps threatening. Is a human being inside that box? Fly's cue, as it turned out, was the whir of the electric window motor.

 

Eureka! Slick had made a chain of associations from drive-thrus/window motors/ to mailboxes. He carried on because there was someone inside our mailbox.

 

They are obsessive/compulsives and their handler really, really, really doesn't want the dog choosing what it obsesses about.

 

Donald McCaig

[Liz P]

First, never correct a fearful dog for barking at someone. By correcting your dog he is learning that 1) he isn't allowed to warn people he is scared and is more likely to bite "unprovoked" 2) meeting new people is an unpleasant experience and he might get punished and 3) you will not protect him, so he must protect himself.

 

There must have been something about your stepdaughter that scared him (odor, the way she moved, spoke or looked at him, something she was wearing, etc). It is best if she ignores him completely, talks softly without looking at him and randomly drops super yummy treats any time he is near her. She can also play a fetch game with him (if he likes fetch). It's ok if he brings the ball to you, but then hand it to her and have her throw it.

[Root Beer]

It is also OK to neutrally remove your dog from the room and take him to a safe place (from his perspective) when he is fearful. It won't "reinforce fear" since fear is not an offered behavior that the dog chooses in the way a dog chooses to sit. I've employed this technique with several fearful dogs with excellent results.

 

If you have your daughter give treats, you can have her toss them away so your dog has to increase the distance between himself and her to get them. That can serve to put the dog at ease (he will not be forced into close proximity with the trigger), teach the dog how to increase space on his own, and build the dog's confidence for choosing to gradually move in closer.

[JohnLloydJones]

Strangers can sit calmly, but if they move to a new room or even return to the room after going to the bathroom, it's as if they have never been in the house before.

Ah yes, I had a foster boy like that. He had to be carefully restrained as guests came through the door, calmed down when they were seated, but would immediately react when they stood up. He didn't bark, he would dive and nip their ankles (fortunately mostly their shoes). I supplied guests treats to give him; that helped, but we had a couple of neighbors who refused to enter the house until both dogs were crated.

[bc4ever]

Sounds like your dog is reacting in the house, not elsewhere. My dog is MUCH more fearful and protective inside his own territory than he is out in the world. Strangers can sit calmly, but if they move to a new room or even return to the room after going to the bathroom, it's as if they have never been in the house before.

Mary

Glad I saw this. Had a similar experience just this week. My ten year old (?) rough collie, Daniel, and I were outside getting the mail when my friend arrived. She got out of the car; he was friendly and relaxed, but the minute we walked in the house, he started barking at her. I wouldn't say she's an infrequent visitor. He does the same thing with my sister, and she's been around him since the day we adopted him in November. When my nephew came last weekend, he didn't bark once at him, or his beagle. No issues. He does eventually warm up to my sister, but never really does with my friend. I have no idea if she sounds, looks or smells like someone he knew previously. Having her throw treats in his direction doesn't seem to have much effect. I tell her to ignore him and I tell him calmly "Thank you, that's enough." It may take a while, but we're working on it.

 

He's usually very laid back; nothing much bothers him. He's a registered therapy dog and is used to strangers touching and petting him. The only thing I could think was that he is protecting "his" territory. Your post confirms my suspicions.

[Lewie'sMom]

I think sometimes it's simply a matter of somebody not liking someone else. Do you always like the people you know? I don't. Even though there my not be any rational reason, sometimes we just can't "click" with a person. I don't see why it's any different for dogs. While we can be polite and be on our "party manners" dogs are too honest for that. They can't mask their feelings.

 

No offense meant to your step daughter, but there may just be something about her Jake doesn't like, no fault of hers. I say don't push anything, encourage her to be very patient and Jake may decide that she's okay sometime in the future. Perhaps she could take on the role of food lady when she's with you. Let Jake come around to her in his own time which hopefully will happen. But, it may not and that will have to be okay.

[Jexa]

+1 to not correcting your pup for being scared, having your step daughter ignore him, and the fact that he's probably more reactive in his house

 

 

 

There may just be something about her that Jake doesn't like, through no fault of hers. One of my husband's best friends is a very nice guy who often visited us. He is quiet, calm, and acted exactly the way we asked him to around Rudder, including giving him treats from a distance. Rudder never had a bad experience with him, but for whatever reason, he was just scared of him for a very long time. Maybe it was his smell, who knows maybe it was the fact that he came by wearing a blue shirt on a Tuesday at 4. I feel like sometimes with BCs you'll just never know.

 

 

 

It will probably take a lot of time for your pup to get used to your stepdaughter, but if you correct him, he'll only learn that you won't protect him from what he considers scary situations, so he needs to protect himself. Have her ignore him totally when she comes over, and/or have him go somewhere he's happy- maybe his crate, or another room. Having Jake meet her somewhere outside your house would probably help a lot too. It's amazing how much friendlier dogs can be just by taking them out of their home. I know it would mean a lot to you if Jake liked your stepdaughter more, but you just have to be patient and let Jake work through it in his own time.

 

 

Good luck!

[geonni banner]

I second the notion that your dogs don't necessarily like everyone, or even everyone you do.

 

My dog had serious issues with almost all strangers for a long time, due to a rough puppyhood. She is much better now, but still is fearful of some and slow to warm to most. But from the first, there were some folks she just took to, and would wiggle and wag with real pleasure whenever she saw them, and allow petting and all manner of contact.

 

Dogs are also good at sensing ambivalence in their owners for an individual. I had a neighbor in my apartment building that gave me the creeps. Since I am the building manager I was always polite to him, but underneath that I disliked and was a bit fearful of him. Sugarfoot hated him and would growl any time he was near. I gave the man treats to give her when they ran into each other in the yard or hallway, and she would take them, but would only come close enough to take the treat, and would retreat a few steps to eat it. This had the unforeseen effect of making him dislike her for being "fickle." Soon she would not even take the treats. Fortunately he moved away.

 

When my dog takes a dislike to someone for no obvious reason I search my feelings about that person. If it is a new person to me, I think about what my first impression is - do I distrust or dislike the person too? Do they annoy me or make me feel awkward?

 

If it is someone known to me, do I have unresolved issues with that person? Are there feelings of rivalry, jealousy, hurt or anger? Do I just not like them?

 

What really throws me is when my dog right away takes to someone I detest. Makes me really examine why I have negative feelings toward that person. What I find is not always flattering to me.

 

Sometimes it just seems that the dog doesn't like a person. I try to respect that, and while I insist that the dog be civilized, I don't insist on trying to make the dog interact.

[Gloria Atwater]

Sometimes these dogs just invent things, I think. I took my Nick up to meet my parents, last year, and for who knows what reason, he took an instant and vigorous dislike to my mother! My MOM, for pity's sake! But apparently just the way she bent over to look at and pet him freaked him out, and after that, he wouldn't come anywhere near her, and hid behind me and growled, if she tried to approach him and make up.

 

To add insult to injury, though, he mothered right up to one of the staff (they're in assisted living) who showed up minutes later. So ... sometimes it's just a simple thing that sets them off and causes them to dislike or mistrust someone. In my mom's case, it was just the way she bent towards him, which seemed little different than the way anyone else would approach him, but to Nick, it was everything.

 

Sorry I'm no help ...

 

~ Gloria