Heartbroken!! =[

[OneGirlAndHerBorderCollie]

Hello Everyone=] My name is Chloe, I know nobody know me here but I thought I'd reach out to other Border Collie owners who know what I'm going through =[. I moved to Fresno California from Nottingham England in October 2009 for Christmas my boyfriend bought me my pride and joy Storm, my now 6 months old smooth coated tri colored BC. Everything has been going wonderful, her training is almost complete and I have booked her into agility training for once she's one, however my heartbreak is yet to begin=[ Next week Wednesday 27th January I have to fly back to my home town due to family problems but because the plans were so sudden I cannot take my precious Storm! And it could take up to a year before I'm back in the states, my world feels like it's crumbling around me because Storm isn't just a pet she's my best friend and part of my family. My boyfriend is just like get over it she's just a dog and you'll see her again but she's like my child I'm gonna miss a big part of her growing up. A family that I'm close too have agreed to take Storm while I'm gone, their gonna take pictures and videos to send me but it's not the same I wanna be there. When I'm back in the UK my mother is planning to surprise me with a border collie bitch which she doesn't think I know about, I know she's just trying to make me feel better but then I'm gonna be going through this all over again when I leave. Is what I'm feeling normal or do I just care way to much about my dog?

 

Chloe

[aljones]

Hi, Chloe,

 

I'm really sorry to hear that family problems are calling you back home and away from Storm. That must be really tough, on lots of levels.

 

Do you think there's any way to put your mom off the plan to surprise you with another dog once you're in the UK? Like maybe a mutual friend or another family member who could explain to her that, in the long term, having to leave that dog behind when you return to the US is going to be really hard?

 

I hope your move back home goes smoothly and that things get sorted out there more quickly than you expected so that you can return to California and Storm ASAP.

[scomona]

That sounds like a difficult situation. Im sorry that this has happened. I hate leaving my pup even overnight and can just imagine your heartache.

 

As the above poster said, I would call your mom to let her know not to get you another dog. It will be unfair for the dog since you will be leaving again soon.

 

Maybe a nice idea would be to hook up with a Border Collie rescue in your new location. You could offer to walk a dog or take it out for weekend hikes..etc... that way you can still be close with Dogs while you are away.

 

Im really sorry for your situation- Im glad that you found someone to care for your pup while you are away and hopefully you will be reunited soon!

[OneGirlAndHerBorderCollie]

I can't stop my mother, she'll wonder how I found out about the puppy in the first place ( I accidentally opened an email while looking for something) and get angry for being "nosey" or if I explain to her the problem she'll call me "un-greatfull" So it's a lose lose situation there. I get so attached to my dogs back in the UK I have two miniature dachshunds ones 6 years old ex show dog I shown myself and a 3 years old with special needs (she's in a wheelchair) and my 1 years old chihuahua it was hard leaving them behind. None of them were fly safe so I had no choice but with Storm she really caught my heart and this new puppy will probably catch it too ( just cause i love BC's) maybe I could fly the new puppy here but I just don't know Storm might feel pushed out. I'm really gonna miss my Stormy

[scomona]

I can't stop my mother, she'll wonder how I found out about the puppy in the first place ( I accidentally opened an email while looking for something) and get angry for being "nosey" or if I explain to her the problem she'll call me "un-greatfull" So it's a lose lose situation there. I get so attached to my dogs back in the UK I have two miniature dachshunds ones 6 years old ex show dog I shown myself and a 3 years old with special needs (she's in a wheelchair) and my 1 years old chihuahua it was hard leaving them behind. None of them were fly safe so I had no choice but with Storm she really caught my heart and this new puppy will probably catch it too ( just cause i love BC's) maybe I could fly the new puppy here but I just don't know Storm might feel pushed out. I'm really gonna miss my Stormy

 

Hi Again-

 

So you already have 3 dogs in England? And one dog is in wheelchair? I dont want to butt in..... but I think you need to be willing to risk your mom being upset. If you already have 3 dogs then it doesn't really make sense to get more. Who will care for all of these dogs? I would just tell your mom the truth and that you have 3 dogs already and you dont need a puppy that could instead go to a home that will have it potentially for life.

 

Just my opinion..... I just don't think it is fair for the Border Collie since they do really get attached to their "person" and in this case you know that you will have to leave.

[IPSY]

Hi Chloe,

 

I think if your honest with your Mom, she will understand. Explain that going through the heartache of leaving your buddy Storm behind cannot be eased by another dog . This is kinda silly , but put it to your Mom this way, when you are able to come back to the US , would she go get another daughter to ease the pain of you leaving again ?

Maybe somehow Storm can join you at a scheduled later date ? Is it possible ?

 

Seems like you have a few dogs already in the UK , so another dog can only make it harder for you..

Maybe your Mom is the one who wants another dog ?

 

Im so sorry you are going through this pain. It must be terrible. I wont go on a vacation because I dont want to leave my dogs. I dont care if I ever go on a vacation either. Just being with my dogs is all want. Ok ,ok , a night out is grand too , but thats it. In the car all the way home , I miss my dogs. My husband feels the same about his dogs and understands my feelings ( he's a angel )

 

I hope you can have a good talk with your Mom and get past the open emails and other issues that are coming between you two. Once you and your Mom get past the hurt feelings , the clouds should clear and you two will have a better understanding about the dogs. Im sure your Mom only wants to see you happy , so remember to to have her feelings in mind as well.

 

Good luck

[OneGirlAndHerBorderCollie]

Perhaps my mother does want another dog? Ever since getting Storm I told her how amazing,smart,fun and wonderful border collies are and she actually seemed interested, she knows I've always wanted to do agility and get to crufts so maybe it's her way of trying to help but I wanted to do that with Storm I don't know, she always wanted an active dog but was unsure about bc cause of their reputation.I'll talk to her and see whats up

[juliepoudrier]

I don't understand why Storm can't go with you. There's the whole Pet Passport system, and if you follow the rules, then you ought to be able to fly Storm to the UK. If the timing is bad, it seems to me your boyfriend or the friends who agreed to take care of Storm could get the necessary health clearances and send her on. If it's too costly, then I can understand having to leave her behind. Re: the new dog. You could follow the same procedure on that side of the pond and bring the dog home with you if you wanted to. If your BF likes border collies, perhaps you can do a twofer (one for each of you).

 

Anyway, I know that's not the question you asked, so in response to that, I'll say that yes, I find it difficult to leave mine behind and wouldn't be happy if I were suddenly called overseas (other than perhaps for a short trip) and had to leave them behind. That's perfectly natural. It sounds to me as if your BF doesn't have the same sort of connection with dogs that you do, and that's a shame.

 

J.

[Lokisaab]

rules for bringing dogs into the UK

 

 

woah. the regulations for getting around Britain's 6 month quarantine rule are really tough. There's no way she could take Storm as a spur of the moment decision.

 

 

 

REQUIREMENTS FOR DOGS FROM THE U.S. OR CANADA TO THE U.K.

 

Pets must qualify and meet all of the rules and regulations listed below to be considered for the Pet Travel Scheme. If your dog does not qualify for any reason (including a faulty or unreadable microchip), he or she will be required to enter quarantine with a petition to obtain early release.

 

Rules and Regulations, And How to Prepare Your Dog

 

1. Qualify: Dogs must first qualify for the Pet Travel Scheme. Pets must come from a qualifying country, like the U.S. or Canada, and cannot have been outside qualifying countries during the six months before your dog enters the UK.

 

2. Microchip (At Least 6 Months or more before traveling): Dogs must have a microchip inserted underneath their skin by a vet. The microchip must be inserted BEFORE the required rabies vaccine. Have your vet test the microchip before and after it is placed in your dog, and each time your dog visits the vet. Microchips given in the U.S. and Canada typically do not meet ISO Standards. The microchip needs to use ISO Standards in order to be read by the U.K. microchip readers. Therefore, you should bring your own microchip reader with you. This is especially important if traveling to the U.K. first, then other European countries, and then back into the U.K. If your dog's microchip cannot be read, your dog will most likely have to go into U.K. quarantine. Be sure to bring all original microchip paperwork with you from the vet.

 

3. Rabies Vaccination (At Least 6 Months or more before traveling): Dogs must be at least 3 months old to receive a rabies vaccine. The vaccine must be done AFTER the microchip has been placed in your dog. Your vet is responsible for recording the following information on your dog's rabies vaccine record: microchip number, dog's date of birth/age (if known), date of vaccination, vaccine product name, vaccine batch number, and date by which the booster must be given (usually 1 to 3 years from current shot). Bring the information with you.

 

4. Blood Test (At Least 6 Months or more before traveling): AFTER your dog has received the microchip and the rabies vaccine, you must have your dog's blood checked to show that the rabies neutralizing antibody titer is equal to or greater than 0.5 IU/ml. The blood test must be done in the U.S. or Canada. Your vet MUST send the blood sample to a lab that is recognized by the U.K. Pet Travel Scheme. Look at the PETS website below for details and for finding a recognized lab. Your vet must give you paperwork with the following information: a record or paperwork stating the date that the blood sample was taken, your dog's microchip number, and a copy of the blood test result with the microchip number clearly stated. If your dog fails the blood test, another vaccination, blood test and 6 month rule will probably be required. You will need to carry the blood test results with you.

 

5. Official PETS Certification (6 months or more AFTER your dog passed the blood test, before traveling): If your dog passed the blood test, a PETS certificate will be issued ONLY when 6 months or more has passed since the blood test was given and passed. This is called the "6 Month Rule" which is in place just in case a dog became infected with rabies before the rabies vaccine. Supposedly a dog infected with rabies would show clinical signs of rabies within 6 months. The certificate MUST be obtained from a vet that has been authorized the by U.S. or Canada government to issue such certificates. Take your dog, the vaccination record, and blood test result when going to get the certificate. Ask your vet if they are authorized to issue this certificate or get a recommendation for a vet that is authorized. The certificate must show "Valid from" and "Valid until" dates. Your dog can only enter the U.K. between those two dates. The "Valid from" date will be 6 months from the date that your dog's blood was tested. Ask your vet for a renewal certificate each time your dog is given a booster shot. The booster shot must be given by the "Valid until" date. Then your renewal certificate is valid as soon as it is issued.

 

6. Tick and Tapeworm Treatment and Certification (24 to 48 hours BEFORE your dog gets on the plane): Your dog is required to be treated for parasites between 24 and 48 hours BEFORE your dog is checked at a US or Canada airport leaving for the U.K. An official certificate for parasite treatment is required. A vet must give the tick and tapeworm treatment. Pet owners are not allowed to give the treatment themselves. Vets are required to use a parasite treatment that includes the product "praziquantel" for tapeworms, along with a product licensed for use against ticks and the product must have a marketing organization within the United States and Canada. Tick collars are not acceptable. The certificate must be official and not a private veterinary certificate or letterhead to show that it has been done. The official certificate is one issued for the purposes of PETS by the US or Canada government. It will have the name of the government department at the top. The official certificate must show your dog's microchip number, the date AND time of treatment, and the products used. The vet must also sign, stamp and date the certificate. If using a pet transport company, make sure they arrange for your dog's PETS certificate and tick and tapeworm certificate to accompany your pet (you should also have copies). The parasite treatment is required every time your dog enters the U.K.

 

Please note: If your dog failed the PETS requirements only because of the tick and tapeworm requirements not being met, it might be possible to have your dog treated in the U.K. quarantine and then released after 24 hours of the required treatment. If your dog arrives at Heathrow Airport, the treatment can be done at the airport. If you fly into any other airport, your dog will need to go into quarantine for treatment. If your dog is entered into quarantine, your will need to get approval for your dog's early release.

 

7. Bring All Documents With You: You must bring all documents and certifications with you. This includes microchip paperwork (and a microchip reader), rabies vaccine information, blood test paperwork and results, an official PETS Certificate, and an official Tick and Tapeworm Certificate.

 

8. Additional Requirements: You will need to use an approved route and air carrier for entry into the U.K., have an official seal on your dog's carrier or container, a declaration of residence (PETS 3 Form), and Customs paperwork. Please continue reading below for details about these additional requirements for bringing a dog from the U.S. or Canada into the U.K. or call the PETS Help-line listed below.

[juliepoudrier]

The OP didn't say how long she would be gone--I just assumed it would be a good while, in which case it would be possible to meet the requirements of the Pet Passport scheme if she chose to do so.

 

J.

[mbc1963]

This is a horrible situation - and I give you my sympathies.

 

Now, this might sound heartless, but... I'm thinking of time in the eyes of a dog, rather than a human.

 

You've owned this dog for three months, maximum... though it sounds like it's only been one month, since the dog was a Christmas present. And now you'll be gone overseas for a year, or perhaps more. I'm wondering if it wouldn't be kinder to just let the dog permanently go to a new home, rather than let it live with a different family for a full year and then make it leave its home yet again. After a year with the new family, the dog will be fully bonded to them. I imagine they'll be fully bonded to the dog, too. That could create a really tricky situation, when you return and are ready to take Storm back.

 

Again, I hate to seem cold-hearted, but you sound like you're not fully settled into your life, yet, with lots of moving and chaos going on. It sounds like you can't be certain where you'll be in a year or two, or whether you'll be able to care for any of your four dogs. (I also wonder why your mother would consider getting you yet another dog, unless she has a sense that you'll be staying in the UK permanently?)

 

To me, caring for a dog is a very serious commitment - one I wouldn't choose to make unless I was as certain as I could be that I'd be stable and in a place to give excellent care, myself, for the dog's life.

 

Mary

[jingi]

Hello Everyone=]And it could take up to a year before I'm back in the states, my world feels like it's crumbling around me because Storm isn't just a pet she's my best friend and part of my family. My boyfriend is just like get over it she's just a dog and you'll see her again but she's like my child I'm gonna miss a big part of her growing up.

 

Chloe

 

i feel for you...while not having a family emergency...i'm kind of in the same situation...i live in japan...i've been looking for a BC for a long time...only i didn't want to get one from japan...not much herding stock here...well i finally found one in the u.s....and pam was nice enough to understand my situation and help me out...she's a good friend and i really appreciate her and all she's done/doing...i don't have cobb yet...i was able to fly to the u.s. and meet him over xmas/new years...and for that i'm very grateful...but from the time he was born until the time he can finally come to live with me will be about a year...it's hard...but i've waited a long time...since i was in jr. high to find him...and while i will miss cobb as a puppy and watching him grow into a teenager...i also keep in this in the back of my mind: it may be a year until cobb is "home"...but after that i envision many, many years of spending time together....and that is what keeps me from going crazy....so hang in there and think about all the time you will get to spend with...and dogs are remarkable...as we all know...they take a lot of "bad stuff" and they still manage to come out with a smile and a wagging tail...

 

oh...here's a pic...the little bugger is fast...so i have few pics that aren't blurry...this was when he was about 5 weeks old....

[Shetlander]

You've owned this dog for three months, maximum... though it sounds like it's only been one month, since the dog was a Christmas present. And now you'll be gone overseas for a year, or perhaps more. I'm wondering if it wouldn't be kinder to just let the dog permanently go to a new home, rather than let it live with a different family for a full year and then make it leave its home yet again.

 

I have to agree with this. I know you love this puppy but sometimes the best thing we can do for our dogs (or our kids or any loved one) is also the hardest for us personally. Your life sounds very unsettled and may be so for up to another year? More? You already have 3 dogs in the UK and now a puppy you need to leave behind. Now is as good a time as any to tell your mom that the last thing you need is another dog you may also have to leave behind at some point in the future. Even if that means a big blow out, it will be for the best (again sometimes the hardest on us) for that next puppy who will be coming into an unstable situation with an owner who may need to leave her behind at some point in the future.

 

I'm sorry this is such a hard time for you and hope that things will get better soon.

[juliepoudrier]

You know, I think Liz and Mary make a very good point.

 

J.

[urge to herd]

As painful as it is to read/hear, I think putting the needs of the dog first is really, really important here. You've already got 4 dogs on 2 continents. That's a lot of responsibility, and your life sounds pretty unsettled.

 

Finding a good home for your puppy here in the States is the best thing for everyone. I know you feel like she's the dog of your dreams and you can't let go of her, but think about her best interests. She's better off making a move into a good situation now and staying there. If your family are in the UK, you may be going back and forth again. What's to happen to the pup if you need to spend another several months in the UK again?

 

And sad to say, there are plenty of dogs available. If you come back to the States in a year, and you still want a bc, there will be no shortage. You may think she's the only dog for you, but trust me, and the many other multiple bc homes here. I've got 2, had 3 until about 15 months ago when we had to put Buzz to sleep. Each of my dogs is the only dog for me, they each have a unique place in my heart that only fits them. And there will be more dogs after these guys are gone, each with their own special place.

 

I hope you can find some peace of mind about your situation.

 

Ruth

[Alaska]

I think what's concerning some of us is that your posts seem to be all about your needs and wants, without really discussing the needs of your dogs. All of us here care a lot about dogs or we wouldn't be here, and we certainly understand how hard it is to be separated from our dogs. That said, perhaps you might find some peace in this situation if you focus less on your own desires and more on doing what's best for the dogs you love.

[WyoBC]

I can't even think about how hard it is for you to have to leave storm behind for a year. I know you are heart broken about this but you have to think about storm. I can't say what's best for you but I know border collies are one family dogs and they don't always bounce around from family to family very good. Maybe it would be best for storm if you let storm go to another family and when life settles down get another border collie. I know it won't be easy. I have regretted letting a border collie go that I was fostering a while ago. BUT, I know she's in a good home and is loved so that helps. Maybe they can still let you know how storm is doing too. You know the old saying.. If you love them, let them go. Wish I could help more