rough day

[geonni banner]

My Dog is not Stupid

 

My dog is not stupid

or crazy

or retarded.

 

My dog is anxious.

 

She barks at people that

she doesn’t see

everyday.

 

People who smell different

each time she encounters them

are confusing.

 

But then,

if she knows you, she will

be sweet.

 

It doesn’t help to yell,

or hiss,

or call her rude names.

 

And it hurts my feelings.

Because I am anxious too.

I have been for thirty years.

 

I’ve learned not to bark.

Mostly.

But I’ve had thirty years to learn.

My dog is not yet two.

 

I’m sorry my dog barks at you.

But she’s my best friend.

So be nice.

Please.

 

What you say to her

tells me what you

don’t

say to me.

 

Think about it.

[Blackdawgs]

A couple of years ago, a member of an agility class that I was attending refered to my dog as the "Border Collie who wanted to eat other dog's faces off" on a Yahoo newsgroup. I just happened to read her lovely message.

 

While it was extremely hurtful (and untrue), it did prompt me to pull my dog from the class and address my dog's behavioral problems.

 

Last weekend my dog passed her good citizen test.

 

So, I would suggest addressing the element of your dog's behavior that caused the person to react in a hurtful way. Although the delivery of the message was less than ideal, parts of the message may be valid.

[Eileen Stein]

Insightful and very well said, geonni.

[Sue R]

It is a beautiful poem - just because a dog has problems doesn't make that dog any less loved. And, as pointed out, someone's reaction does give any one of us a reminder to evaluate our dog's behavior and what we might do to make their life even better.

 

At Bluegrass one year, my "don't worry, he's just a scaredy-cat and won't do anything" dog reacted to a kind man who then gently reminded me that it was my responsibility to deal with that problem to avoid any possible issues that might arise in the future. He was right, and he certainly gave that message in a much kinder, constructive way than was given to you and your dog. That was Dr Ben Ousley, a gentleman of the highest caliber.

[geonni banner]

A couple of years ago, a member of an agility class that I was attending refered to my dog as the "Border Collie who wanted to eat other dog's faces off" on a Yahoo newsgroup. I just happened to read her lovely message.

 

While it was extremely hurtful (and untrue), it did prompt me to pull my dog from the class and address my dog's behavioral problems.

 

Last weekend my dog passed her good citizen test.

 

So, I would suggest addressing the element of your dog's behavior that caused the person to react in a hurtful way. Although the delivery of the message was less than ideal, parts of the message may be valid.

 

We have been working on Sugarfoot's "issues." She has gone from being a growly, hackles up, skulking dog around strangers, to a dog that usually barks once or twice and then chills as long as they don't push her. She may never be a social butterfly, but she is improving - and her circle of trusted friends is growing.

 

This poem was written in response to a friend who acts inappropriately toward Sugarfoot's bark at the door - there is usually one or two (barks) - a friend who should know better. I know it's my responsibility to do the best I can to "normalize" Sugar's response to strangers. It's a work in progress.

[Sue R]

I'd be more worried about a dog that did not bark at a knock on the door than about one that did. We're talking dogs here, not robots.

 

And, a friend that includes "hissing" at an anxious dog is deliberating behaving badly, which apparently, the dog is not.

[Blackdawgs]

I assummed that Sugarfoot was acting out on the street. One or two barks at the door in his own home is perfectly appropriate. It's your house, your rules; this applies to your dogs and your human friends.

[geonni banner]

I assummed that Sugarfoot was acting out on the street. One or two barks at the door in his own home is perfectly appropriate. It's your house, your rules; this applies to your dogs and your human friends.

 

She sometimes does bark on the street, but she nearly always barks at my door when someone comes. I'm working on the barking mostly because of the agitation that comes with it, not so much the barking itself. She is uncomfortable - feels a bit threatened - so she barks, "Go away!" I'm trying to help her to not feel threatened. When that happens I think she will bark only when it is appropriate. At least, that is how it usually works with the anxious dogs I've worked with.

[geonni banner]

I'd be more worried about a dog that did not bark at a knock on the door than about one that did. We're talking dogs here, not robots.

 

And, a friend that includes "hissing" at an anxious dog is deliberating behaving badly, which apparently, the dog is not.

 

Usually my door is open - with a screen door, closed. I think she is worried that the person at the door will open the screen and come in. She barks less fiercely when the solid door is shut. But for reasons of ventilation (my place is quite small) I keep the door open. I do shut it if she's having a bad day, or if there is an unusually high rate of traffic in the hallway, like when there's a party in the courtyard.

 

People take offense when a dog barks at them sometimes. It's a knee-jerk reaction for some people. They take it personally. Stupid, but there it is...

[Sue R]

You might want to try teaching her an "alternate" reaction to someone coming to the door, like going to a particular place and lying down (a crate, maybe, or a throw rug, or just a location). She could learn to do this whenever someone comes to or by the door.

 

My friend has a very reactive Aussie. She taught her a "calming" position when she might be stressed. It's a bit odd to see Hazel lie down on her side in certain situations, but she's learned it as a way to reduce stress and avoid reactivity.

 

Thanks for more info about your situation. Dogs bark for many reasons - "Intruder at the gates!" to "Family's here!" - it's a form of communication and within reason, should not bother people. But, as you say, some let it.

[geonni banner]

Well, it's funny. I'm the first one to be annoyed by random barking - my reaction to stress. But barking to a purpose - "I'm scared! Stay away!" or "You look like trouble... Come in here and I'll eat you!" I have more tolerance for.

 

I am teaching Sugarfoot to come to me and touch my hand with her nose when someone comes to the door - or if she gets hinky about someone we meet while outside. It helps to focus her. I can try to get her to go to place or simply lie down later - but for now it makes her feel very vulnerable to lose the option of mobility when she's stressed. Baby steps. Her flight distance is shrinking, but slowly.

 

She got zero socialization for the first six months of her life, so this will probably take awhile...

[bn_here_b4]

Seems like Sugarfoot is doing what she should.

 

I expect my dogs to bark when someone comes to the door. They usually let me know when a car pulls into the driveway. When I come to see who is there, they stop barking and stand beside me ( unless it is a friend for whom they want to do the happy dance ). They do stay alert and right by my side for strangers until they sense that I'm ok with the visitor. I love that about my dogs. I guess they know I don't like surprises.

[pammyd]

Lovely poem!!

I have a reactive dog, and I AM working on it, but sometimes the world is a bit too much or I make a mistake and she reacts

She has never attacked another dog or person but people still feel the need to look at you as if you are scum, to yell helpfull comments like 'that THING should be chucked in a skip' or to try and pssst at her in the hope this 'magic' noise will show her who the boss is anc calm her down

I have also had people offer (kindly, really thinking they are helping) that I can shut her up in a garden with a dog she is reacting to (A GSD that has attacked her) and they can sort it out and she can realise the other dog is the boss

 

but once when I was walking into a outside car show, at the enterance it was a bit narrow and there was a dog coming the other way, I walked her over to the side where it was quieter but she was reacting. The lady called over to me 'He used to be exactly the same, they do get better' - that was just the nicest thing!