bc4ever Posted February 19, 2012 Report Share Posted February 19, 2012 A year ago today, we had no idea how our world was about to be turned upside down. Never in our wildest imaginations could we have come up with such a violent, tragic scenario. It's been a long year. The physical wounds did eventually heal, but I still have several deep scars on my arms and hands, which strangely enough, have suddenly begun to hurt again in the the last few weeks. The emotional scars remain. Some nights when I turn out the lights, I lie awake and visions of the attack will creep into my mind, and I am there again; the shock and disbelief of what was happening, the terror, the growling, the screams, the blood everywhere, thinking I was surely going to die. Thankfully, the flashbacks and dreams are becoming less frequent, but when they come, they come with a vengeance. In spite of all that, the good memories far outnumber the bad. I am now able to talk about him and laugh at his antics, and my heart overflows with the love I had for him. We were so blessed to have him in our lives those few short years. This morning, I reread all the wonderful, heartfelt notes of sympathy and encouragement posted here. I cried, but it reminded me what a compassionate and loving community this is; a place to not only share our experiences and exchange ideas, but to come for comfort and reassurance during the bad times. We now have Daniel, a rough collie we adopted in December, and he's a sweet old boy, but sometimes, if he stares at me too long, or tries to climb up in my lap, I get a panicky feeling in the pit of my stomach. It's been a struggle, but I think I'm making slow but steady progress in my recovery. Daniel will never be Scooter--not even close. I know that. He is a totally different dog, looks and personality wise. But, he helped ease some of the pain and loneliness we felt when Scooter left us so suddenly, and way too soon. We needed Daniel, and he needed us. His calm and quiet nature has gone a long way to helping soothe my jangled nerves. I'm learning to trust and love again. I think Scooter would be pleased. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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