Company for Thanksgiving

[bc4ever]

Just found out we're having company from Colorado for Thanksgiving--my brother and sister-in-law, their two dogs (an angel of an Aussie and a mini-mutt with a nasty attitude) , my niece and her three girls ages 2, 7 and 16, along with the half dozen or so in town relatives.

 

A few months ago I wrote concerning taking Scooter with me on a trip to Colorado to see them, but that got cancelled.

 

We can accommodate everyone here, sleeping wise. My main concern is the two dogs suddenly encroaching on Scooter's territory. Things went pretty well two years ago when they came, but he's older now and more used to being an "only child." Ideally, the three dogs would meet in a neutral location, but life being what it is, that won't be possible. They'll be arriving very late Saturday evening before Thanksgiving. He's not normally dog aggressive, but it might be different on his own turf. Generally, the Scootmeister is a real party animal--the more people, the better.

 

They'll be here for five days. I would prefer to keep him on as normal a routine as possible. Any suggestions for a peaceful, incident free visit? Last time "mini mutt" snarled and snapped at everyone and bit their Aussie in the throat, causing a very serious infection. What's the best way to handle someone else's unruly dog, while still keeping peace in the family? I don't want Scooter being terrorized or injured by this little bitch. (Both definitions fit here, as per another thread..)

 

Signed,

Overwhelmed in Ohio!

[geonni banner]

Just found out we're having company from Colorado for Thanksgiving--my brother and sister-in-law, their two dogs (an angel of an Aussie and a mini-mutt with a nasty attitude) , my niece and her three girls ages 2, 7 and 16, along with the half dozen or so in town relatives.

 

A few months ago I wrote concerning taking Scooter with me on a trip to Colorado to see them, but that got cancelled.

 

We can accommodate everyone here, sleeping wise. My main concern is the two dogs suddenly encroaching on Scooter's territory. Things went pretty well two years ago when they came, but he's older now and more used to being an "only child." Ideally, the three dogs would meet in a neutral location, but life being what it is, that won't be possible. They'll be arriving very late Saturday evening before Thanksgiving. He's not normally dog aggressive, but it might be different on his own turf. Generally, the Scootmeister is a real party animal--the more people, the better.

 

They'll be here for five days. I would prefer to keep him on as normal a routine as possible. Any suggestions for a peaceful, incident free visit? Last time "mini mutt" snarled and snapped at everyone and bit their Aussie in the throat, causing a very serious infection. What's the best way to handle someone else's unruly dog, while still keeping peace in the family? I don't want Scooter being terrorized or injured by this little bitch. (Both definitions fit here, as per another thread..)

 

Signed,

Overwhelmed in Ohio!

 

Alas, I would probably resort to a fib here. To wit: "I'm really sorry, but Scooter is just getting over a brush with (kennel cough, the black plague, leprosy,whatever) and it mightn't be safe to bring your dogs. Can you get a pet-sitter?"

Too bad about missing the Aussie, but it might prevent more than just feelings getting hurt...

[Izzysdad]

The white lie isn't a bad idea...

 

Do they know mini-mut has an attitude? Or does he walk on water with them? Could you raise your concern about mini-hellian encroching on Scoot's kingdom without anyone getting upset? If no, I would go with the lie.

 

Tim

[Pearse]

What's the best way to handle someone else's unruly dog, while still keeping peace in the family? I don't want Scooter being terrorized or injured by this little bitch. (Both definitions fit here, as per another thread..)

 

Signed,

Overwhelmed in Ohio!

 

Find a room in your house where the nasty dog won't be. Keep your dog there for most of the time the visitors will be in town. Let him out when you are going for walks or when they can hang out supervised in the back yards.

 

Get a crate. Put the nasty dog in the crate or in another room while you let your dog out to socialize.

 

Simple. It won't kill your dog to be confined for part of five days. Won't kill the other dog either. Less stress. Everyone is happy, and no need to fib to the relatives, plus when you want to visit CO, they won't have any excuse for you not to bring your very well socialized dog.

 

Pearse

[Maralynn]

Separate and rotate. Your house, your rules and your company should be able to abide by them.

 

Since mini mutt has a history, explain that she will be the one to be crated in a separate room during the busiest times. And explain to your relatives that you don't want to risk your dog getting hurt. If they're halfway reasonable they should see your logic and be more than willing to abide by it!

[bc4ever]

Do they know mini-mut has an attitude? Or does he walk on water with them?

Tim

She pretty much walks on water. My sister-in-law rescued her a few hours from being euthanized, and so they make all sorts of excuses for her bad behavior, "poor thing."

 

I've discussed it with my brother several times. The strange thing is, he's had dogs all his adult life--German Shepherds, Rotties, etc. and they were all very well behaved, beautiful, lovable dogs. I've pointed out to him that there's no way he'd have put up with the attitude from his other dogs. I've also told him that big dog or little, a bite is a bite, and some day she's going to "nip" (their word) the wrong person.

 

Divide and conquer sounds like a good strategy.

[2 Devils]

I would crate and rotate. In the past we had a total of 9 people and 6 dogs here for Thanksgiving. 3 yrs ago the rottie died so we were down to 5 dogs. Last year we had 11 people and 5 dogs. This year we will have at least 9 people only 4 dogs. The other visiting dog passed recently. It will actually be weird not having all the dogs under foot.

 

When needed a couple of my dogs were crated. We kept the baby gates up to block off portions of the house to block dogs from the dining room and to give the one dog his own space if needed. He was very timid and could get overwhelmed.

 

I choose to crate my dogs as it is easier since they are crate trained but if the other dogs would have been crate trained I would have asked for a rotation.

 

Just explain to your guests that you plan to institute a rotating crate schedule. 1 because you want to prevent any fights, 2 to prevent all the dogs from being under foot the whole time causing areas to be over crowded and 3 because you do not want a human bit. Let them know in advance that you would like to do this to avoid conflict when they get there. Most times as long as ALL dogs are rotating there should not be any problems. Discussing this in advance should also prevent last minute hard feelings since they will know in advance and can either get used to the idea or make alternative plans for the dogs and/or themselves. If their dogs are not crate trained then they should be left in the room they will be sleeping in while they are visiting.

[hsnrs]

Totally agree about alternating the dogs and out of crate times. We have 2 females who don't get along and that is what we do. It is only for a few days so you can probably deal with it for that short amount of time. It is nice to have relatives for the holidays; ours don't travel so we must visit them which is hard. Enjoy.

[bc4ever]

Totally agree about alternating the dogs and out of crate times. We have 2 females who don't get along and that is what we do. It is only for a few days so you can probably deal with it for that short amount of time. It is nice to have relatives for the holidays; ours don't travel so we must visit them which is hard. Enjoy.

It is nice to have relatives for the holidays. Thank you for reminding me of that. I haven't seen my brother in two years, and since both parents are now gone, the holidays have seemed a little hollow and sad. Knowing that Scooter picks up on my energy, I need to stop worrying about this (or as our attorney always used to say to my husband, 'Don't give me 'what ifs!'") and get ready for a joyous Thanksgiving. He's a good dog. He'll do fine. If he's fine, the other two dogs will be too. Thanks for the virtual "Snap out of it!"

[ejano]

You know, maybe its arriving at the half-century mark, or maybe it was going through cancer, but I just don't put up with a lot of nonsense anymore. If someone is coming into my home as a guest, I want to make them as comfortable as possible, which is why I put my dogs away unless I'm sure the people want to meet them -- and some people do not get to play with them even if they want to because they're idiots around dogs. For example, we were walking in the woods behind my aunt's property last week and she came out to meet the dogs. Robin immediately tried to slurp her hand. She reported to my mother that my dog tried to bite her. She's 81 years old. I'm not even going to try to change her mind but that's the last time she'll get near my dog.

 

I would not allow someone to bring a dog in to wreak havoc in my house nor more than I would allow a child to act up in a manner that will hurt them or someone else. We have an in-ground swimming pool which is fenced in, but you better believe I've corrected at little Johnny or Susie if they're seen anywhere near the gate or doing something else that is going to result in them getting hurt.,and their parents are gabbing away waiting for the kids to behave. We also have an adult nephew with psychological problems, asperger syndrome as well as an alcohol addiction and-- because of the Asperger's (a form of autism) he needs a great deal of guidance in interacting in a group. For his parents, he's an 800 pound guerrilla, he can do whatever he wants because they've dealt with him unsuccessfully for thirty years. But not in my house. He gets out of line, he gets corrected, quietly and without embarrassing him. I make a point to buy him sparkling non-alcoholic wine so that he can participate in a way that doesn't harm him. I honestly think he's grateful. I do these things because all of these situations, my other guests are uncomfortable.

 

It is a challenge to deal with family, because you don't want to hurt them. On the other hand, you think just as much of your dog as they do of theirs. The little monster stays in a crate, in their guest room, or in their car. Anywhere he can't harm or bite other kids or dogs as he is the problem to be managed.

 

Lord, I love holidays!

 

Liz

[geonni banner]

You know, maybe its arriving at the half-century mark, or maybe it was going through cancer, but I just don't put up with a lot of nonsense anymore. If someone is coming into my home as a guest, I want to make them as comfortable as possible, which is why I put my dogs away unless I'm sure the people want to meet them -- and some people do not get to play with them even if they want to because they're idiots around dogs. For example, we were walking in the woods behind my aunt's property last week and she came out to meet the dogs. Robin immediately tried to slurp her hand. She reported to my mother that my dog tried to bite her. She's 81 years old. I'm not even going to try to change her mind but that's the last time she'll get near my dog.

 

I would not allow someone to bring a dog in to wreak havoc in my house nor more than I would allow a child to act up in a manner that will hurt them or someone else. We have an in-ground swimming pool which is fenced in, but you better believe I've corrected at little Johnny or Susie if they're seen anywhere near the gate or doing something else that is going to result in them getting hurt.,and their parents are gabbing away waiting for the kids to behave. We also have an adult nephew with psychological problems, asperger syndrome as well as an alcohol addiction and-- because of the Asperger's (a form of autism) he needs a great deal of guidance in interacting in a group. For his parents, he's an 800 pound guerrilla, he can do whatever he wants because they've dealt with him unsuccessfully for thirty years. But not in my house. He gets out of line, he gets corrected, quietly and without embarrassing him. I make a point to buy him sparkling non-alcoholic wine so that he can participate in a way that doesn't harm him. I honestly think he's grateful. I do these things because all of these situations, my other guests are uncomfortable.

 

It is a challenge to deal with family, because you don't want to hurt them. On the other hand, you think just as much of your dog as they do of theirs. The little monster stays in a crate, in their guest room, or in their car. Anywhere he can't harm or bite other kids or dogs as he is the problem to be managed.

 

Lord, I love holidays!

 

Liz

 

Here, here! All of the above!

The reason I suggested lying to get them to leave their dog at home is that half of the nicest people I know are as dumb as a bag of hammers about dogs. And half of the ones that aren't think that rules of conduct should apply to all dogs but theirs. Sure as doG made little green apples, people get ticked if you suggest - however tactfully - that their dog is a disaster waiting to happen. Then everybody' all cranky and the get together turns into an armed camp.

I hope things go well for you. You have my best wishes and hopes for a peaceful and "uneventful" visit! And no, I don't mean that sarcastically!

[bc4ever]

Here, here! All of the above!

The reason I suggested lying to get them to leave their dog at home is that half of the nicest people I know are as dumb as a bag of hammers about dogs. And half of the ones that aren't think that rules of conduct should apply to all dogs but theirs. Sure as doG made little green apples, people get ticked if you suggest - however tactfully - that their dog is a disaster waiting to happen. Then everybody' all cranky and the get together turns into an armed camp.

I hope things go well for you. You have my best wishes and hopes for a peaceful and "uneventful" visit! And no, I don't mean that sarcastically!

Didn't take it that way! I appreciate everyone's input. Bottom line though is that they can't afford to kennel their dogs right now and I really wouldn't want that to keep them away. They're also coming to see my sister-in-law's father who was just diagnosed with cancer. If Miss Mini Mutt gets huffy, there's a nice big crate in the basement with her name on it! My home, my dog, my rules. Keep a good thought!

[Krambambuli]

I kind of have a similar problem in reverse. When we go to my brother-in-laws house, my nieces' dog is confrontational with our dog. Chloe is a hound/doberman mix or some such thing, and is at least twice as tall and almost 3x as heavy as little Sky. When Chloe was a pup they got along fine, but since she is fully grown (she's been spayed, so I don't think that is the problem), there is a lot of tense behavior, and if we don't watch them like hawks, they get in fights.

 

Now, ever since that became clear, I keep Sky away from Chloe and my niece is doing the same. But these visits are often family celebrations of one kind or another, and there are a lot of people milling about, and a lot of stuff going on, and once in a great while it does happen by accident, that Chloe gets away, and of course she comes running over to jump on Sky, literally. Sky is by now quite scared of her, but if pushed she will defend herself. We haven't ever had a serious incident, and we've both been even more vigilant -- so this is really not a problem.

 

But -- and this makes me mad: my brother-in-law acts like it's all Sky's fault (even though she stays away from the other dog on her own accord), because Sky is the one who will start warning Chloe off, and then gets snarky, because Chloe doesn't understand or doesn't want to understand. Again, let me emphasize, this hardly ever happens, and I have Sky on a leash by my feet, unless Chloe is outside or in her crate. But then I get to hear comments like, "maybe Sky should be in the crate if she can't behave", or "this is Chloe's house, why should she be on a leash or in a crate" ... well, you get the drift. This is not coming from my niece, who frankly is sad and embarrassed about her dog's behavior, and really does her part to make the visits successful. I'm getting frustrated with Sky getting blamed and I feel there is resentment building up on both sides, about us bringing our dog. I have considered leaving Sky at home, but that means that we cannot stay very long. It's an almost 1 hour drive there, and then back again, and I really dont like to leave Sky alone for hours on end. She's a good dog, she doesn't get into anything, but ironically she loves going to their house. They live on 50 wooded acres, and visiting them also has been helpful as far as her fear of people and especially kids is concerned. She is happy to see them, and even interacts with them, which is a huge step forward for her. I'd hate to miss out on that part of the visiting.

 

But if the comments continue, I might change my mind and not bring her, for peace's sake. I don't want to get in a fight with my brother-in-law over this ... but I'm starting to have a hard time holding my tongue. I am not angry at Chloe. She is a nice dog otherwise, and I know that females often don't get along. Also she has basically no contact with other dogs ever. Sometimes, after we've been there for a while the dogs relax enough to actually want to play with each other, and do without aggression of any sort. But it's always hit or miss, so we are careful.

 

Family stuff is never easy!