Jump to content
BC Boards

The Peril of Animal Rescue Volunteer Work


Recommended Posts

Pansmom,

 

Why on Earth would you want to adopt a dog with potential issues? You just had one; you had difficulty handling it, and then had it PTS. I do not know you, so it is tricky to say with any certainty; but it seems to me that if you would like another dog, perhaps you should consider options that are more reliable and can give a proper sense of a dog’s true personality?

 

I know that saving a dog is wonderful, but not everyone is equipped to handle what may be hidden underneath the cute and needy exterior. I am not saying that you are or are not prepared; as I can not possibly make that judgment. Nor am I being disparaging; but rather, I am being realistic.

 

I have a dog that is complicated, so I know how hard it can be to manage. I am not implying that this dog that you pine for is extraordinarily difficult; but I think that you should really, REALLY reconsider.

 

Karrin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 102
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Why on Earth would you want to adopt a dog with potential issues? You just had one; you had difficulty handling it, and then had it PTS. I do not know you, so it is tricky to say with any certainty; but it seems to me that if you would like another dog, perhaps you should consider options that are more reliable and can give a proper sense of a dog’s true personality?

 

If you want to avoid issues, then it's best to avoid dogs altogether. And the severity of issues vary. My "issues" dog passed her CGC and therapy dog certification. I know that you want to stack the deck in your favor as much as possible, but it is impossible to avoid all health and temperment issues 100%.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you want to avoid issues, then it's best to avoid dogs altogether. And the severity of issues vary. My "issues" dog passed her CGC and therapy dog certification. I know that you want to stack the deck in your favor as much as possible, but it is impossible to avoid all health and temperment issues 100%.

 

Thanks, Maralynn. And Dracina, I agree, I should be wary, but I really want a dog. And I am thinking long and hard about this, really I am. But I don't think this girl is a "problem dog." I think she's behaving admirably for what she's going through right now... I just think she's shy and stressed out. The refusing to budge is a great way of dealing with anxiety - if Pan was in her situation, well, Pan never would've made it to her situation, because Pan dealt with her fear by growling and biting and attacking whatever was closest. For this dog to get where she is now, she has to have won over several animal control workers, a vet tech, and a vet, and never showed any propensity to aggression at all - even just nipping will knock them out of the running for adoption row, or doing the slightest snarl - showing any kind of anxiety related aggression too, because they are competing with so many other animals to get to adoption row. Also there is an ex-temperament tester/dog certifier person on staff. The animal supervisor. I mean I've been watching how they operate from the inside for a month, and 80% of the dogs in this facility are euthanized. So when I say this dog is sensitive, I just mean, she's not crazily exuberant like the dachsunds and terriers are, to be in her kennel. Instead she is wary, and anxious, and at first she was showing it to me by staying put and making eye contact, as if to say, "I'm not sure I like this environment." It was only her second day there. To me her behavior seems sane and stable, communicative, deferential. And she grew to like me quickly. And both times I took her out Friday (spending probably an hour with her total) she didn't jump or bark. (I haven't ever even heard her bark actually.) When I arrived, I saw her outside, calmly hanging out with the other small dogs. If you ask me, this dog is sensitive and smart, smart enough to be wary in a new environment. I certainly wouldn't be tail-wagging and having a grand old time if I was kenneled up inside when I never had been before. Isn't shyness under stress and weird silly random neuroses like not liking unfamiliar floor textures par for the course with BCs? The way I understand it, these are really smart dogs. You have to expect a certain level of quirkiness from them! In fact, isn't that one of the joys of the breed? Quirks I can take. Quirks I will love. And this girl is 1/2 Pan's size and the opposite of assertive. She doesn't seem to have that crazy demanding edge Pan did. I know it would be safer and easier to get a lab or a dachsund or something, but I really don't want one. I wouldn't feel this way about a lab or a dachsund. I want a smart, quirky dog, who I can train and go for long walks with and teach vocabulary to. But, yes, yes, Dracina, you're right in that I should be really careful. I know.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Karrin-

What's the flippin issue?!!! She's unsure about tile?! Give me a break! That isn't even an issue worth mentioning. Big deal if she is a bit shy at the rescue. Does that mean she isn't fit to be a pet?

Everything in life has its issues. Get over it. Everything worth having is worthing working for.

 

Go for it Pans mom!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi ErinKate:

 

The “flippin issue” has very little to do with the dog or Pansmom in particular; rather, the idea of taking a dog out of the shelter that might have unknown issues that an adopter may not be prepared to handle. Now, if you just had to put a dog to sleep because it had aggression issues, wouldn’t you be extra careful the next time?

 

According to the OP, this dog:

-probably has heartworm

-is sensitive and has fears (“I see several neuroses in her already”)

-is lacking confidence

-is unproven around cats and children (of which the OP has both)

 

From what the OP has presented, this dog has potential issues.

 

I am all for rescuing, and both of my dogs came from a shelter. I love them dearly, and would never trade them for anything. But, I have the time, patience, and money to attempt to address their complexities. The OP is lacking some of these, by her own admission.

 

It is an admirable thing, to save these wonderful dogs. But, the fact is, not everyone can or is equipped to handle it when things go awry. I am not implying that Pansmom can not do this; perhaps she is the best dog owner ever. I am not holding her prior experience against her; rather using that experience to present a pragmatic solution. If she wants a dog, then I am suggesting that she explore other options that may produce more reliable results (i.e., a reputable breeder).

 

Karrin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Money and time are really not issues at this point. My job is stable (I work for the State), and because of Pan I ended up finding freelancing/additional income opportunities. My experience with Pan taught me that I will do what is necessary to take care of a dog. What's more, I will enjoy it, except in very extreme cases (where I am being threatened/caused pain, or the dog is in pain or miserable). So heartworm I can and will pay to treat (I spent literally thousands of dollars on Pan before we eventually gave up, which we did for emotional as opposed to financial reasons--her emotions as well as ours included). And I can make time for a dog, at the end I was spending hours a day doing behavior mod on our property and keeping a behavior journal and corresponding with the behaviorist. I would love to have a dog with whom I could try agility or just go running with! Hiking. Exploring. Those options just were not available for a dog like Pan whom by the end had deteriorated so badly I'd been advised not to take her out in public anymore, doctor's orders. Anyway compared to Pan, this dog's neuroses are extremely mild (so mild as to seem almost nonexistent, or cute, and understandable). Plus she really blossomed under praise, never showed an ounce of aggression. And just to be clear, we actually don't have kids, we're just looking forward to the time that we will have them and planning for them (if we had kids already, I'd just bring them to the shelter and see how she did with them - I wouldn't have to try to borrow my friends' kids to come with me). Anyway, I still haven't made a decision, but I can tell you this: no way am I ever going to consider getting a dog from a breeder (reputable or no) when I'm not going to use them to do stockwork or the equivalent. No offense to anyone who feels differently, but there is no guarantee and I'd rather take my chances on a rescue. I like what ErinKate said, everything worth having takes work.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Karrin, what makes you think getting a dog from a reputable breeder would be "safe"? I got Skip from one and he is a PITA! His parents both run open, his siblings that were put on stock are doing great, and he is scared to death of sheep! He is scared to death of most things. He bullys Jackson, and it is only from my management and the fact that Jackson is so non-reactive, that they can live in the same house. Pan, IMO, had a few wires crossed. She just couldn't function in any sort of normalcy. I suppose you could cram enough pills down her to make her safe, but she wouldn't be able to move! It wasn't "issues" Pansmom had a problem with, it was the vicious attacks and unpredictability of those attacks. Big difference.

 

I don't know what this dog will end up being like, but then either pup or another shelter dog is a crap shoot too. Even getting a dog from a rescue with known personality can not work out if the dog and person don't "click". I think she could handle most problems and the dog has already shown that she can be worked through problems. What else can you ask for?

 

Pansmom, if you decide to take this dog, I wish you only the best.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Pansmom, I wish you all the best in your efforts with Sophie! Quite frankly, I have 4 dogs....all of them have 'issues'. Jazz, who I got from a breeder, hates our cats but in the 10 years we've had them, well, they are all still in one piece :rolleyes: Cricket, a 'farm bred' dog that I acquired at 6 months old, was terrified of everything. She's 6 years old now and we manage - we don't let her around people she doesn't know and she still has days when the floor scares her!

I think your experience with Pan has taught you many things and I'm sure you will be wise when it comes to Sophie. Personally, I'm looking forward to all the good posts you will have if she comes into your family!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am really not trying to argue, but are you kidding me? Really? You think a breeder's dog comes with less chance of issues? There is no way to tell that. What might be an issue for me, may not be an issue for you. My three rescues came "with issues". One dog's issue was he worked "too much". No off switch. Not an issue for me, I found him handy and eager. Wtih the proper handle and energy outlets he rocked. Dog 2 came with a broken hip and couldn't move so fast. So I got him surgery and used him as more of a "steady" while dog 1 did the job of 3 dogs. Dog three was a true hunting JRT. Would kill any cat or small animal he saw. Not an issue to me, I don't have cats or small animals. Was never exposed to children, but got along better than any dog I know.

 

You can't discount a dog that is shy in a loud chaotic setting.

Confidence takes time in any dog. No big deal.

Is unproven w/children and cats---says who? It is just unproven because it is unknown.

heartworms? Again unknown at this point. And if so, is not a death sentance.

 

Any dog from any setting has unknown issues. Don't ever think if you pay more for a dog you won't have issues.

As rude and insensitive as this sounds, I said a long time ago for her to get rid of Pan. But instead she kept dropping $$ into that dog, carting it all over the state to talk with vets and behaviorists. She kept a journal about the darn dog. My journal would have been one short page---"dog came at me w/teeth---end of story" (sorry pansmom :rolleyes: ) I can look back now and see her dedication as an owner. This next dog is a cakewalk. I don't care if she eats cats, CAKEWALK compared to what she has gone through.

I agree, to each their own, do what you think is best.

Good luck Pansmom, I have to stop posting on this thread because I know I will start getting snarky.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

My two cents (and more), FWIW.

 

1. You can't really judge a dog's true personality in a shelter situation. Border collies especially seem to be more stressed than most by a shelter setting. Her behavior in the shelter may or may not be indicative of her true personality.

 

2. Regarding cats, I have never had a problem teaching a dog to leave my cats (who were mostly here first) and other small critters (like bantam chickens) alone.

Maybe I've been super lucky and have just never gotten a dog with an incorrigible prey drive, but I can say that when dogs belonging to other people have stayed here, I have also been able to teach them to leave small animals alone. Not knowing how a shelter dog is with cats wouldn't be a dealbreaker for me.

 

3. Regarding children, I don't think you'll be able to judge a whole lot by taking strange children (i.e., children the dog doesn't know) to the shelter where the dog is already under stress. My own dogs are a bit child shy, but are absolutely fine with children they know. For example, I had Lark and Phoebe out with me at a Tractor Supply the other day. Lark was very uncomfortable about an unknown child approaching her, but did allow it with me right there. And yet, I have friends who come over with children, most recently a friend with a child Lark didn't know, and she was just fine with him. My dogs seem to distinguish between "known" children vs. "unknown" children--and although I'm not sure what they base their "opinions" on, I think they must take some "signal" from me, because as I said, when an old friend showed up with her child recently, none of the dogs were the least bit concerned about him, whereas if the parent had been a stranger to me, the dogs would likely have been a bit more wary of the child(ren).

 

4. If there is a rescue near you, you might be able to work something out with them to take the dog in and then allow you to foster it. Alternatively, you can adopt Sophia from the shelter and if she doesn't work out, try to get her into rescue later. I think there are probably more options than just adopt her or don't from the shelter. Get her out of the shelter, which is most important for her mental/physical health, work with her some, and then decide about her, and get her into rescue if the decision is against keeping her.

 

5. The honeymoon period is very real. But remember that you also have just as much chance of finding that a dog who is a bit shy or scared in a shelter situation is a real gem when moved into a real home as of finding the dog has issues you can't live with. There are gazillions of successful adoptions out of shelters all the time. We don't hear about them precisely because they are successful. We hear about the disasters because those are the situations where people will look for help.

 

6. You learned a great deal from living and working with Pan. You are now way better equipped than the average adopter to work with a dog with issues (or one without them). And of course the only way to find out if she really has issues is to get her out of the shelter and into a more normal home environment.

 

Ultimately, the choice is yours and your husband's. It sounds like Sophia is really tugging at both of your heartstrings. I don't see any harm in giving her a chance, especially if you are able to set up a back up plan in case it doesn't work out.

 

J.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I am pretty disappointed that an alternate opinion, particularly one that is not at all nasty or begrudging, would make anyone want to get “snarky”. Also, I am a bit concerned that people are so eager to get all up in arms over a situation that none of us really know anything about, other than what the OP has posted.

 

It is great to debate the validity or ridiculousness of positions. I understand all of those ideas presented, and Julie in particular makes some very clear and smart points. When posting here, it is helpful to remember that not everyone will agree (nor should we)! We can all cheer the OP on without question for a variety of reasons, but it is useful to be objective, and present things from an angle that the OP may not have viewed. I think that there is room for both. No one here wants to see a person or a dog in a failed situation.

 

Never once did I state that getting a dog from a breeder will ensure success, or be safe. What I did imply was that perhaps the OP should look into other options, which might be more reliable, and not be sold so quickly on a dog that she knows nothing about. What I mean by reliable is, in a situation that can give an accurate sense of the dog’s true personality (for example, a dog that has been fostered in a home with a family and other pets, or a dog from a breeder where the sire and dam and/or littermates are available to see and evaluate). Or, as others have suggested, perhaps she can attempt to enter into a foster arrangement. Of course, this is not a 100% fool-proof method to getting a great dog, but a bit of background will only help- not hurt- the OP’s chances of success.

 

As I said before, I am all for rescue and shelter dogs- these are all I have- but some people are not equipped or able (for a variety of reasons) to handle potential problems. I am certainly not implying that every rescue or shelter dogs will have issues that are insurmountable! Nor am I implying that the OP is unskilled or unable to deal with these issues. But, she has just had a very difficult experience with her last dog, so why should she enter into another potentially difficult (by her own estimation, not mine) situation? Why should we encourage her to "leap before she looks" without suggesting that she explore other options?

 

However, as I also stated, the OP is in charge of making a decision that works for her and her family. Not for me, or for anyone else. Everyone wants a successful outcome!

 

Karrin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't think that one should acquire a dog thinking that if it doesn't work out, the dog can go into rescue. In my experience, rescues are reticent to take dogs from "good" private homes with exceptions made for things like owner with major illness, owner is loosing housing, etc. Rescues are packed now--it's puppy and kitten season, people are loosing their jobs and homes--this just isn't a good option in my opinion.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And it bears repeating: not all dogs with "issues" are comparable. My first dog, Sophie, has some issues. She was pretty reactive as a youngster and still can be if not managed well. She saw demons and threats where there were none, she hated skateboards, bikes, poodles, and often mistook other dogs' passing glances as challenges. We worked through these issues, like millions of other dog owners do (particularly, it seems, first-time dog owners). Not really a big deal in the grand scheme, though at the time it seemed enormous.

 

There is no way I would compare my experience with Sophie with Pansmom's experience with Pan. Pan wasn't simply "a dog with issues," she was mentally ill and a danger to her family. I commend Pansmom for doing all she could with Pan, and I don't think Pan was euth'd because Pansmom "wasn't equipped to handle potential problems." Karrin, though you keep peppering your criticisms with the disclaimer that you're not judging Pansmom's ability to deal with a dog's issues, it sure comes across that way. Especially as you imply that you are a shining example of someone who does have that seemingly rare ability.

 

But you're comparing apples and oranges. Poor Pan did not have the same "issues" that your dogs do; neither did she have the same ones that Sophia may have. I understand your point to proceed with caution, but let's be fair with the assessment of the situation.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And it bears repeating: not all dogs with "issues" are comparable. My first dog, Sophie, has some issues. She was pretty reactive as a youngster and still can be if not managed well. She saw demons and threats where there were none, she hated skateboards, bikes, poodles, and often mistook other dogs' passing glances as challenges. We worked through these issues, like millions of other dog owners do (particularly, it seems, first-time dog owners). Not really a big deal in the grand scheme, though at the time it seemed enormous.

 

There is no way I would compare my experience with Sophie with Pansmom's experience with Pan. Pan wasn't simply "a dog with issues," she was mentally ill and a danger to her family. I commend Pansmom for doing all she could with Pan, and I don't think Pan was euth'd because Pansmom "wasn't equipped to handle potential problems." Karrin, though you keep peppering your criticisms with the disclaimer that you're not judging Pansmom's ability to deal with a dog's issues, it sure comes across that way. Especially as you imply that you are a shining example of someone who does have that seemingly rare ability.

 

But you're comparing apples and oranges. Poor Pan did not have the same "issues" that your dogs do; neither did she have the same ones that Sophia may have. I understand your point to proceed with caution, but let's be fair with the assessment of the situation.

 

Hmmm. Laura, perhaps I am missing something here. Are we reading the same posts? Please point out where I have criticized the OP or been unfair. Or where I have compared the OP's dog to mine, or implied that I am a "shining example of someone who does have that rare ability"?

 

Regardless, it is clear that most only want to hear, "go for it, Pansmom!" so I am throwing objectivity to the wind and agreeing. Go for It!!

 

Karrin

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't think that one should acquire a dog thinking that if it doesn't work out, the dog can go into rescue. In my experience, rescues are reticent to take dogs from "good" private homes with exceptions made for things like owner with major illness, owner is loosing housing, etc. Rescues are packed now--it's puppy and kitten season, people are loosing their jobs and homes--this just isn't a good option in my opinion.

Blackdawgs,

I stand by my comments. I am well aware that rescues are full to overflowing, but I still think it doesn't hurt for Pansmom to have a backup plan if they really want to try this dog and the shelter won't work with them by letting them foster first. Many rescues *do* offer courtesy listings, advice, and the like to people looking to place a dog, and since Pansmom has already expressed an interest in fostering, I fail to see how my suggestion that she contact a rescue and see if they couldn't back her up is much different than her fostering in a more formal sense for, say, the same rescue.

 

J.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This idea is certainly a step up from the concept of adopting from a shelter and, if things don't work out, dumping the dog back at the shelter where its chances might go to zilch as a "failed adoptee".

 

I'd really like to see Pansmom and hubby give this dog a try - a chance with a family that has shown their willingness to go many extra miles to make something work for the dog's sake is certainly IMO a worthwhile opportunity for this nice-seeming little girl.

 

Pansmom - I sure hope it works out well for you two and for her. Bless you all!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

As far as rescues go, if Pansmom decides she isn't the right dog, but would still foster her, a rescue should have no problem with that. Just because some rescues might me inundated with pups, they may not have, say, a good 2,3, or 4 yr. old dog, but have adopters waiting for one. You never know. I wouldn't even worry over that aspect.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hello all. Pansmom, I read most of your experiences with Pan, and have read most of the posts about the possibility of you adopting another border collie. So much, if not all of what I read talks existing, or potential psychological issues with the dog that place the blame for bad behavior on that. Personally, when I work with my dogs and they display issues, I always turn the mirror on myself and ask; what am I doing to cause this? The answer always begins with me, or as an old friend was fond of saying; "It's always the nut at the wheel."

 

I know lots of you will get angry that I don't excuse dog behavior by believing there is something inherently wrong with the dog, but never the less, I don't. I really do believe that in the right hands, all dogs are good, or can be brought right again when they're not. So, Pansmom, my suggestion for you is to remember your struggles with Pan, and consider whether you are the right hands.

 

One definition of crazy is making the same mistakes and expecting different results. Maybe another breed would be more suitable to your temperment and lifestyle, and I would suggest something older. There are so very many senior dogs in need of a forever home, that were heartlessly thrown away. I fostered and found a forever home for one. Oscar is a tremendous little dog, and it was one of the most rewarding things I've ever done.

 

Cheers and best wishes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Now THAT is the way to elequently present an opposing opinion.

 

I am a believer as well in thinking there are VERY few dogs that are "not wired right". I too believe most problems come from the owners, and in the right hands you find "right" dogs. I believe 100% that Pan was more dog than Pansmom could handle. With that being said, she also should not have to be banned from ever owning another dog. She just needs to get one that is more suitable for her situation, and maybe some guidance from a trainer. It seems reasonable to me that she has been spending time at the shelter with the dog and has considered fostering before a permanant home.

 

For the sake of the animal, I hope you are able to get the dog and she works out for you. I think you have probably learned a lot along the way including mistakes. And as Amelia said, how to look at how your actions effect behavior.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I know lots of you will get angry that I don't excuse dog behavior by believing there is something inherently wrong with the dog, but never the less, I don't. I really do believe that in the right hands, all dogs are good, or can be brought right again when they're not. So, Pansmom, my suggestion for you is to remember your struggles with Pan, and consider whether you are the right hands.

 

Thanks for your input, Amelia. I have thought a great deal about this and will continue to think on it.

 

Physiologically, there are many differences between this dog and Pan. She appears to be a lower energy, sort of entry level BC. She is full grown at half Pan's size (25 vs 50 pounds), polite, calm, she doesn't jump or bark, she does not appear to be (by anyone's measure, not just mine) assertive or demanding. Instead everyone says she's shy and polite. She is not a puppy. The shelter vet estimates she is 4 or 5.

 

Physiologically, I am twenty-five pounds lighter than I was when I got Pan and in much better physical condition. I am really looking forward to picking back up with lots of exercise and outdoor activities with a new dog, whenever I get one (such as having a jogging partner for as much as 3-5 miles a day, something I wouldn't have dreamed of doing when Pan was a puppy).

 

Emotionally and psychologically, I know that I made several mistakes with Pan in the beginning, that exacerbated her behavior instead of discouraging it. The biggest was underestimating her intelligence, and spoiling her, and I will never, ever, make that mistake again. There were other mistakes I made too, which I consulted with several highly trained professional authorities to learn how to fix. One of these was taking some bad advice and trying very confrontational methods for a couple of weeks. Another was lack of consistency... underestimating the power of eye contact... letting the dog take advantage of me... not knowing what to expect from the dog... not knowing how to expect something and communicate that to the dog with body language. I could go on. But I really don't feel the need to air my dirty laundry on here (again)!

 

In short, this dog is not Pan, and I am not the person I was when we got Pan, especially as it pertains to dogs. Working with Pan taught me so much (and I will always be grateful to her for that). I am very confident around dogs now, even large dogs, I've worked with a doberman, a GSD, labs... I can get them to do basic obedience with me very quickly - even dogs that others say are apparently untrained - sheerly using eye contact and body language. They don't pull me on leash (even though they pull others--other volunteers say they have to use choke chains). I am calm around them, I have high expectations, and the dogs, more often than not, tend to meet them.

 

That being said, however, I do not think I caused Pan's core problems, nor did her veterinary behaviorist. While it is beneficial always to ask yourself what you have done to cause this, when a creature you are responsible for does something terrible, there is a point at which this kind of questioning becomes useless and masochistic. For example, my uncle is a schizophrenic. I do not blame my grandmother that he beat up a police officer last year. It wasn't her fault. The man is very mentally ill! And while there are some environmental triggers for his condition, you have to have the genetic makeup for schizophrenia to develop it. Scientifically, we accept that humans are not blank slates, born into goodness, then ruined by society; we believe that some people are genetically flawed from the get go. Therefore, I do not see why we should extend some sort of assumption of genetic perfection onto dogs. They can be, and mostly are, wonderful creatures. But they aren't angels. The idea that every dog can be saved, I think, is a pipe dream. Just like the idea that we can save every person.

 

Pan literally had seizure-like episodes with vicious bite attempts on whatever was closest to her, that were triggered by barely audible sounds from outside. Sometimes she was WONDERFUL. But when her routine was threatened, she was like an oppositional defiant autistic two year old - with fangs. From the beginning, the behaviorist was not very optimistic about her - although she said we would give her the benefit of the doubt and try - she was careful to indicate that Pan had many many strikes against her from the beginning that probably even her littermates recognized (hence the fact that we found her away from the rest of the puppies instead of participating in the group activity with them, when we got her). By the end, when I made the decision to put Pan to sleep, the behaviorist specifically told me to try try try not to feel guilty, because I did so well and came so far for the resources I had to begin with, and that I had done so much more than so many people would've, even trainers. She said even expert dog owners may not have been able to help Pan, as Pan was an extraordinarily difficult specimen. So I searched my soul, for ways to forgive myself for not being able to help her, and the only way I saw to do that is to continue to help other dogs in need. I knew I would get another dog eventually. I wanted one. And this girl is in need. If I don't get her, she will probably end up with some family who doesn't know anything about BCs and just thinks she's "pretty." With my behaviorist encouraging me, at the end, not to give up on all dogdom, and excited when I told her last week that I was thinking about getting another dog, I am not as wary as you are. Sophia may not be the dog, but there is some dog out there for me. You know, I don't know if I ever mentioned it on here, but my husband pushed me into getting Pan. Ironically, I was the one who had to be convinced, way back when, to get a dog. I didn't understand dogs. I didn't know how to communicate with them. But this time - I know - god how do I know - what wonderful and intelligent and strange creatures dogs can be. And I can't wait to have one in my home again.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Pansmom,

 

I am one of your biggest fans here. From reading your posts, it seems to me that you have learned a tremendous amount from your journey with Pan, easily enough to equip you to deal with most dogs you might choose to bring home.

 

Still, I would like to offer a few thoughts. I feel strongly that one of the best ways to acquire a dog is from a rescue that has had the dog in foster care long enough to learn its quirks. There is no way to learn much about a dogs nature in a shelter environment. Also, a good rescue will match the right dog to the right person. My second BC came from a rescue that I wrote to enquiring about a different dog. Knowing me, they said that other dog (shy, thumpy tail, adoring eyes - he peed on my foot and I *still* wanted to take him home) was not a good match for my lifestyle, and they were almsot certainly right. Sent me home with a different dog, a great match for my family, and in the process made me a convert to the rescue (vs. shelter) method of dog acquiring. This is not a blanket endorsement of all rescues, but I do have a lot of respect for rescues that take the time to get to know a dog before even putting it up for adoption, and then take the time to make the proper match between dog and people.

 

I thought the idea of getting the dog into rescue first, then allowing you to foster or try her out, was a good one.

 

As I said, I believe you're well equipped to deal with whatever dog you bring home, but at this point you and your husband deserve to have an easy dog, not one that you will be micromanaging for the next ~10 years. None of us here can pass judgement on whether or not Sophia is that dog. I'm just advocating for a course of action that would allow you to learn a little more about her before making a commitment. Good luck.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I think you would be a great foster OR forever mom to that little collie. I also think you deserve an easier animal, but (and as you also realize) I think it's pretty pie-in-the-sky to expect you'll ever find a flawless one, as we are talking about living, fallible beings. I get the concept of honoring both the deceased animal and the new animal by at least being somewhat stable in acceptance of one's grief after losing an animal before you get the next. Especially the way you lost Pan (which I see as every much a disease of the mind as kidney failure would be to the body). But only YOU know when that point has come, and what it takes to overcome the last animal before it is fair to bring a new one in. So if I might give some unsolicited 0.02 I say trust yourself, whatever course that ends up being. Good luck to you and so glad to hear the volunteering is helping.

 

Pan's legacy is a rich one indeed.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

 Share

×
×
  • Create New...